


Hello for the first time

by kagehime17



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Sburb Session, Bullying, First Kiss, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, M/M, Mild Language, Minor Violence, Online Friendship, Romance, Slice of Life, Teen Romance, bullied!John, possesive!Dave
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-06-20
Updated: 2015-03-20
Packaged: 2017-12-15 13:14:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 23,639
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/849953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kagehime17/pseuds/kagehime17
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John and Dave are online best bros. For a week, Dave gets to visit John… And this is their first time meeting.<br/>A better summary would be Aviators, movies, and beating of bullies oh my!<br/>Romance in later chapters and awkward moments that can be considered dork worthy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Oh… hes coming.

**Author's Note:**

> My first time posting here!!! Yes I am rather excited, I'm not sure what to write here but..
> 
> Dave has a bit of a possessive, over protective side to him. John has a bit of a bullying problem. 
> 
> I am not sure if I can update as often, due to the fact that I am going on a trip soon. Will do my best! But for any absences(or um hiatuses) I do apologize in advance!
> 
> Also, the pesterchum front is going to be a boring front and such, because I do not know the ropes around here yet... (of you know how please tell me)
> 
> (I will edit this again probably.....)  
> Also, this fanfic is written in the POV's of Dave and John.  
> (also I am a bit of a romantic, and a sap you have been warned)
> 
> I'm not really sure what else to write about in this section… oh well.

 

“Hey Egbert!” A rough shove caused me to fall down.

“Oops! Sorry, dork!”

I ignored it. I just imagined what Nick Cage would do in these situations. He would just smile his signature Nick Cage-y smile, and walk away to a premiere. Or a movie set.

 So I simply picked myself up, dusted my knee, and gathered my scattered folders. I ducked out of the hallway and into the last class of the day.

 History class was really interesting. We got to watch a hiss-and-boo film that the Americans made against the Nazi’s during WW2. We booed along with the melodramatic actors, as the ‘patriotic’ Americans waved the star-spangled banner. I found the whole movie to be rather ridiculous, as I instead imagined instead Nick Cage waltzing around in the movie, “National Treasure.”

In my notebook I had doodles of various pranking plans, and methods to go up against my father, the Betty-Crocker-Pranking-Master-Of-The-Universe. Well, the title is waaaaay too long, but the man deserves it nonetheless. He is a master after all, and it is my sworn duty to surpass the pranking legends before me. It’s in my blood.

 “Mr. Egbert?”

 I snapped out of my day-dream, one that involved cream pies filled with shaving cream and  a harlequin. God, I hate those things. Or as Dave would say, “Jegus.”

 “Yes, ma’am?” I eyed the teacher. I wondered randomly if a clown hat would suit her. Maybe not.

“Mr. Egbert, what is your opinion of the movie? How did propaganda shape the outcome of the war?”

 Oh god. Not these types of questions! The simple bullshittyness of them gave me a migraine. These questions are so confusing, ones that you can’t answer with a simple “Yes” or “No”! Well, time to pull a Strider and play it cool.

 “I believe that…” I hesitated, and continued, “I believe that the movie did a good job inspiring people to fight against the Nazis, and hiss-and-boo films helped to raise the patriotic spirit for us keep on going in the war.”

I winced at how stupid I sounded in my answer. Damn it.

The teacher nodded in response, writing down a much smarter sounding version of the shit I just said onto the blackboard.

“Good job, Mr. Egbert.” she praised, and picked on someone else.

After class I was ambushed by idiots.

“Yo, John!”

I turned again to the assholes who pushed me earlier. 

“What do you want?” I asked, wishing I had some prank to gain the upper hand.

“Just wanted to say that you didn’t fuck up so much during class today. The bitch would have assigned more homework if you didn’t answer the way she wanted.”

“What?” my eyes bulged.

 “You weren't paying attention? Dude, she said if one more person didn’t answer ‘correctly’ she would have assigned an essay! So thanks.” I received a crooked smile from the class jerk, and I smiled hugely as well, ‘cause I hated homework. Well, this day had become quite pleasant.

 After school I entered my silent home with caution. Dad was still at work, but he always set up traps. Clowns littered the halls, with harlequin posters and old comedians decorating the spaces between our respective bedrooms.

 I successfully dodged the cheese filled pastry that flung itself at me. I smiled in triumph, then ducked into my room to avoid more pastry-inspired pranks.

 The computer buzzed to life as I logged onto Pesterchum. Oh! Rose is on today! Lately she seems busy with school. Something about her mom signing her up into a band class to play the trumpet. I remembered her saying that she only played the violin and it was her mom’s way to get to her.

 ectoBiologist[EB] began pestering tentacleTherapist[TT]

 EB: hi rose!

TT: Hello, John. I see you arrived home from school?

EB: yup! how was your day?

TT: It was pleasant. Nothing much happened though. I tried to play the trumpet, but ultimately failed. I insisted to my teacher that I’d play the violin, but he insists that this is band class, and if that I wish to play a string instrument, I should go to Orchestra.

EB: that sucks.

TT: I know. Well, enough with me. How was your day? Was it uneventful like mine, or…

EB: it was good actually! i was only pushed down once!

TT: I see. And how is that a good thing John? Anyway, anything else?

 I sighed. Oh Rose. She is going on all therapist-y on me,I know she is!

 EB: um…also we watched a ww2 anti-nazi propaganda film! it was interesting. not as good as the movies i have at home, but it was cool!

EB: also when the teacher asked this question about the movie, she seemed to like what i said

EB: so we didn’t get any extra homework!

TT: That is wonderful John. I’m sure the rest of the class was pleased that they didn’t get any extra assignments as well.

EB: hehe yeah

TT: But do tell me, why are you pushed at school? Are there any bullies bothering you? Please tell me John, I only wish to help you.

EB: nothing rose! just some jerks

EB: on april fools i made the mistake of pulling this awesome prank on them!

EB: and they just got pissed thats all

TT: And what prank did you pull on them, John?

EB: can’t tell you!

EB: a master never reveals his secrets.

TT: Fine, be secretive when I’m trying to assist you.

TT: Oh John, my mother is calling for me. Something about a mexican fruit cocktail. Good bye, and I hope to talk to you again soon.

EB: bye rose!

TT: Bye, John.

 tentacleTherapist[TT] ceased pestering ectoBiologist[EB]

 I rolled around in my rolly chair. Rose can seriously sniff out trouble.

I heard the computer beep and I saw someone else was trying to contact me.

Seeing the name my cheeks suddenly flushed, and I stared in awe at the red glaring letters.

 turntechGodhead[TG] began pestering ectoBiologist[EB]

 TG: hey john

EB: hi dave!

TG: so john like today i was all looking at the clouds and shit

TG: wondering what time is it

TG: then i remembered i had fucking school

TG: that aint as cool as the slick rhymes thats cool

EB: dave that makes no sense!

TG: shhh egderp let the magic of the rhymes happen

EB: /rolls eyes

TG: i see what you did there mister

EB: /sighs and rolls eyes again

TG: oh well then

TG: i guess you dont wanna know what time im coming then

TG: heartless egderp you aint cool

TG: you act like a tool

TG: with your bad movies and whatnot

TG: and pranks that sound stupid what what

EB: just stop dave!

EB: they sound even worse than usual

TG: cause you broke my heart egbert

TG: my rhymes arent going well

TG: i ran out of apple juice in my closet

TG: and i got rained on by my bros smuppets

TG: oh the fucking agony

EG: okay okay geez. you are so dramatic dave!

EG: but you think you can come?

TG: ya totally man

TG: the teachers said ya

TG: my bros cool with it

TG: did dadbert agree

EB: he said he didn’t mind, but what about school? for me?

TG: i can meet your friends man i dont mind

EB: um okay. but i have to talk to my teachers too.

EB: i don’t know if you want to come to school with me at least for one day.

TG: you are scared that i will embarrass you cause im too cool

EB: heck no.

EB: i don’t want you to be bored thats all!

TG: at least you get a week off next week

TG: i mean i do too

TG: oh yeah i leave on thursday

TG: and get there at night

TG: and then go to school with you on friday

TG: friday

TG: friday

TG: gotta get down on friday

EB: dave stop it!

EB: that song is awful!

TG: haha sorry bro

EB: /rolls eyes

TG: in three days huh

EB: …

TG: in three days i get to meet you for the first time

TG: you feel nervous to meet me bro

TG: you can bask in my coolness

EB: i guess.

TG: you guess

TG: bro you broke my heart

EB: no! i mean i feel like i’m going to be boring to you

TG: nah bro

TG: were cool remember

EB: yeah

TG: ahh dude i gotta go need to go pack up some shit and check on flights

 I glanced at the clock. Shoot, I need to finish my homework! I glare at the neglected pile of assignments.

 EB: it’s going to be cold. bring sweaters and warm clothing

TG: what are you my mom

EB: /rolls eyes

TG: sorry mommy i will pack warm clothes

EB: good

TG: well gotta go

EB: bye!

TG: bye

 turntechGodhead[TG] ceased pestering ectoBiologist[EB]

 I noticed that Jade wasn't online today. That sucked. She’s is like a cute little sister to me.

 Then it dawned on me.

 In three days I will see Dave Strider for the first time. In three days I get to meet him. In three days I must deal with the fact that the boy I have been crushing on for the past few years of my life will be sleeping under the same roof as me.

 Crap.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DISCLAIMER: I do not own Homestuck.  
> If I did it would be awesome, but I don't.


	2. Prepping to go to John's

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dave's pov.  
> Dave is getting ready to visit John. He gets a bit of 'pep' talk from Bro, and deals with helpful Zumie employees, and friendly classmates.
> 
> He just wants to see his bro.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: this chapter is now edited! My beta reader came back from her wonderful vacation, and went through the task of editing this chapter and some future ones.. (THANK YOU)
> 
> My headcannon for Dave: he is actually respectful to authority figures.… well to those whom he believes that deserves it(augh turned out awkward). So with teachers, and authority he is too cool to mess with them. (Plus Bro would probably kick his ass if his little brother came home with a nasty note or a police man trailing behind him)
> 
> Another headcannon is that he has a soft spot for childhood movies, such as movies from Pixar.
> 
>  
> 
> I actually bought winter jackets from Zumies before~! They had a buy one, get one free sale with the jackets, and I so desperately needed one.
> 
> I hope I wrote Dave okay....
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Homestuck.

I grab the warmest clothes I could find (Texas can be cold during the winter, but not as ‘cold’ as John said about WA). Thankfully Zumies had a sale on warm fluffy jackets the other day, and I grabbed a few. (flashback time dudes) I sighed thankfully at the “Get one, get the other half off!” They seriously wanted to get rid of the winter clothing.  
I pushed my shades up my nose again. These where John’s gift to me, and I treasured them. A strange thing that a cool kid like me to say, but hey, I’m Dave fucking Strider. I can look cool in anything. Even in a dress… Fuck, I don’t want to think about that incident.

The chick at the counter looked at me, and commented on the shades. I thanked her.

“So…this is warm, don’t you think?” she started, “Going anywhere?”

Small talk, eh? Okay then.

“Visiting a friend up north.” I replied, taking the bag of clothes from her grasp.

“Cool.” she replied, “Have fun.”

I thanked her again, and walked towards home, to finish packing for my visit.

I can see John soon. John, the derpiest kid I have ever met. But we fit well together. Bro’s for life.  
I hear my bro calling for me, to give me an allowance to spend during my stay, and extra cash to pay for the taxi if I need one.

John doesn’t have a car yet, even though we both can boast that we have a licence.

I can drive a rental car, but that shit costs money, and I’ll only be staying for a week. 

“Lil’ man,” Bro started, “Make sure you don’t mess up shit at his school, okay?”

“Why would I?” I roll my eyes. Too bad for the two layers of plastic making it impossible for him see them.

“Cause if you fuck it up you can’t see him again. If you make it difficult for his dad it will also be difficult for him to let his son visit you as well, stupid.”  
My brother had a valid point. But then again, I always considered myself to be well behaved. Bro taught me well.

“I am polite” I argued, “I never fuck up at my school. I respect authority. I never get detention. I am too cool for that.” Yes. Me, Dave Strider. I have a squeaky clean record. I am too cool for stupid shit. Plus I always flash step away from trouble.

“Yes, you are. Just try to follow any rules they have at home, okay? John may have curfew.”

I smirked in reply, and he ruffled my hair. A surprising gesture. We both awkwardly stood there for awhile, and I excused myself to finish packing.

My mind wanders again. I wonder what John looks like now. I mean, occasionally we send each other pictures, but the last one he sent was a year ago. And all of them were crappy grainy ones, unlike the expert photography I sent him, and I look like a motherfucking god in each one. But then again, it was also last year when I sent those photos. 

I imagined a raven haired, buck toothed derp with blue eyes, who is probably shorter than me. I hope he is shorter. ‘Cause I always pictured him short.

On Tuesday my teachers didn’t seem to mind as I asked for Thursday’s and Friday’s assignments. They even gave me text book pages to read from to help understand.

Some girls crowded around me as I spun the dial on my locker the next day, (which was Wednesday) asking about what I was going to do for the next week.

“Are you going to any clubs?” one girl asked.  
“Any music conventions?” a brunette pushed.  
“Trisha, is there such thing as a music convention?” one girl teased.  
Soon a heated debate was held at my locker, and I managed to sneak away. This Strider is glad to be seeing John soon. No more swooning classmates. Cause that is just weird.

I was once again ambushed by guys wanting to hang out. Once again I coolly declined, explaining that I was going to Washington to meet up with my bro.

The rest of the day went like that, and I was thankful when Thursday arrived.

Bro took me to the airport in morning, and gave me a bro fist.

“You have fun, Lil’ man.” he smirked, and handed me my ticket.

“Thanks, bro.” I managed a small smile. We kept our poker faces as I left him behind at the security checkpoint.

With an iPod in hand, I walked into the airplane with a cool kid stride, effortlessly putting my duffle bag into the compartment and sitting down.

However, I stopped the music immediately when the flight attendant announced that they will be playing “Wall-E.”

Cause that robot is the shit. 

I watched the pixar movie intently as the plane soared through the clouds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will post the next chapter really soon... I promise. If you have any questions or suggestions for this fanfic, please don't hesitate! My tumblr is: nagisasama.tumblr.com
> 
> Thank you~!


	3. Why hello there

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is written in both John and Dave's POV, changes in the narration can be seen by the "~" between paragraphs... 
> 
> John is bored, waiting for Dave's arrival, and Dave meets Dadbert at the airport. 
> 
> John opens the door to find Apollo reincarnated into a Texan cool kid standing on his door step.…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Homestuck belongs to Hussie, and I just own the plot and story… Yeah that's about it.
> 
> Head cannon: Dadbert is a snazzy man. John has a mancrush on you know who. 
> 
> My other Dave head cannon: Since Dave is known to have really long monologues in Homestuck, I believe he would be very vocal in his thoughts as well. Also, Dave in this fanfic listens to Deadmou5 and Skrillex… 
> 
> warning: this is the part when the 'author is a sap and a hopeless romantic' can be seen.

The rest of the week was completely uneventful as I impatiently waited for Dave’s arrival.

I replayed the scenario of our meeting multiple times. Each time I pictured him with different hair styles, different t-shirts, accents, and what he brought. A personal favorite was when he was toying with his iPhone, and looks up causally with those shades, with a “Sup.” when I open the door to my home.

Other times was me running through the airport calling his name, and he would drop his bags and run into a tender embrace. For some reason I imagined myself wearing a mustache and a fake nose. “You are such a weirdo,” Dave would coo, as he would peel off my mustache and fake nose. And we would ki-

Shit.  
No, not that! Nope!

I shook the image from my mind as I cleaned my room. My dad would pick Dave up from the airport on his way back from work. Dad baked a special cake for this event, even though I swore not to eat a single bite, because Betty Crocker is evil(even when the old man insisted it was made from scratch and not from that horrid brand).

I got a message from Dave earlier in the day that he just boarded the flight, and it made me so anxious back then. But now, as the hours dragged on, the time when his flight would land came closer and closer. I tried watching movies but I couldn’t focus! My thoughts kept on traveling back to the boy I liked, and I felt like a stupid schoolgirl.

To combat my boredom and nerves, I hatched a plan to make the best prank ever. I need some confetti, a water balloon, and some shaving cream. And maybe just for once, my arch nemesis Betty Crocker may come to use…  
~  
After a painful hour of watching the heartwarming Wall-E and being fucked up over it, I went back to my iPod, and listened to my tracks. I liked listening to my own, and Bro’s. But Deadmau5 and Skrillex occasionally made appearances as I jammed on the rest of the flight.

The captain once again announced that we were close to landing, and that we should put all of our awesome gadgets away. Fine then.

Yawning, I stretched out and enjoyed the view out of the window, and the lush green of Washington took my breath away. I should have taken a picture. Damn.

After the flight landed, I waked out to the baggage claim to meet the infamous Dadbert. From what John had told me, the man was notorious for pranking… and cake. He once told me his dad was a classy ‘business-ey’ man with the fucking fedora, pipe and everything .

I searched around for the man, and my eyes landed on a sign with a crappy drawing of a pair of sunglasses and a bottle of AJ, and in scrawly handwriting read, “Dave Strider.”

I walked my way up the the snazzy man in the business suit, and extended my hand. “Hello, I am Dave Strider.”

John’s dad smiled warmly as he introduced himself. “Hello, I am John’s father. Nice to meet you, Dave. Did you like the picture that my son drew for you? He said something about irony.” His grip was firm.

Good ol’ John.“That's cool.” 

“Well then, Dave, lets get going.”

He offered to take my duffel bag, but I politely declined, saying that it wasn't heavy.

Eventually after a bit of walking, we made it to the parking lot, and to a business-like car.  
A stark contrast to Bro’s pimped out smuppet truck, with My Little Pony decorating the license plate.

We drove through the highway and eventually to a nice suburb. We made some small chat and I felt the vibe that Dadbert didn’t mind my presence. He was a good guy.

I talked about music and photography, and he talked about his work and baking. We became a great combo.

Finally we made it to John’s house, and I was struck by how… ordinary it looked. It had a small playground, a green slime ride thing, complete with a tree with a tire swing. The house was painted pearly white, with a neatly cut lawn.

I was a bit disappointed. 

From what John described, I thought up a house with an army of harlequin’s decorating it, with a bunch of pastries and prankster props littered throughout the yard. Well, I haven’t been inside yet.

“Dave, you go right in.” Dadbert nodded, “I have to go to the store to buy some things. Just ring the doorbell and John will answer!”

I hummed in reply as I walked up the driveway of the neat home, and rung the doorbell.

“Coming!” I heard a yell, and a distant thud, and some colorful language. I snickered as I heard the lock click, and the door swung open.

A boy with a dark mop of black hair stared at me with his mouth hanging open. His eyes…they weren't just blue. They were fucking sky blue, the most prettiest blue I have ever seen. As a photographer, I have seen beautiful skies, but this color in his eyes was just remarkable. They sparkled in pure joy. He had an overbite too. But instead of making him look like a dork, it made him absolutely adorable. He was skinny, you would call it lanky, and he was shorter than me by an inch or two. Jegus, this boy was adorable. He was so cute, and I wanted to just hug him and show him to the girls, gawking at his cuteness.

I mentally slapped myself. Cool Strider. Be cool.

“Dave?” I heard him ask.

“Hello, Egbert.”

His eyes lit up.

“Oh Dave, Hi! Nice to meet you! Gosh you are taller than me!” he gawked, and led me inside.

“Nice to see you too.” I kept my poker face, but my lips turned a little bit upward.

“And you’re wearing the old shades I gave you…Awesome!” John laughed, and closed the door behind us.

“Well duh man, these are cool.” I answered, but whatever I wanted to say was cut off by a hug.  
My cheeked were close to burning a bright red, but I had to keep my poker face. I took deep breaths as the shorter boy squeezed the embrace, and my arms reached up and took in John too.

“Its great to finally see you.” John smiled hugely, looking up at me.

“Me too, bro.” I breathed, “Me too.”

~

(An hour earlier)

I texted dad again, warning him to not be late to pick up Dave. He sent me a reassurance that he would not, but it still kept on bothering me.

I checked my now spotless house, all clean and vacuumed, and sorted.

Now all I had to do was wait.

I fell asleep on the couch, waiting for the car, and woke up when I heard the purr of the engine enter our small driveway.

Oh. My. God. He is here.

The reality of the situation dawned on me, and I silently groaned that my hair was even messier than before, and I cursed myself for taking a nap and giving myself bed head.

My ears perked when I heard the doorbell ring.

My heart pounding, I cried out, “Coming!” and I hopped up, only to trip over my own two feet.

“Shit! Ouch!” I shouted, wincing at the pain. But Dave was here. I didn’t care if I got a freaking bruise over this.

I ran to the door and opened it.

My mouth dropped as I saw the boy in front of me.

He wasn't lying when he called himself good looking. No. That was an understatement. Dave Strider was hot. He was a fucking Greek god. He was Apollo reincarnated to a Texan cool kid. His pale blond hair was styled perfectly, his face smooth, with a nice jaw. He was lean, yet muscular, taller than me. He wore a letterman jacket, with the signature broken record disk t shirt underneath, with dark navy blue skinny jeans with red converse, and I gawked again at the magnificent creature that was standing a mere two feet away.

I knew I sounded stupid. I know. But who cares.

“Dave?” I asked.

“Hello, Egbert.” he replied in a smooth voice. I could tell he was trying his hardest to suppress the accent. I found it to be cute. His voice. His voice brought my shaky vocal chords to shame.

“Oh Dave! Hi! Nice to meet you! Gosh, you are taller than me!” I led him inside, and my heart pounded furiously. This can’t be happening. Oh, it’s a dream come true, Nanna. It is!

“Nice to see you too.” he replied, with a smooth face. But I noticed that he was smiling…a little.

“And you’re wearing the old shades I gave you…Awesome!” I beamed when I noticed that he was wearing those aviators I gave him years ago on his birthday. I closed the door behind us, and faced him.

“Well duh man, these are cool.” he replied, and before he said anything else, I hugged him.

Oh, how great it was to hug the Dave Strider. He was soft, and hard at the same time. I felt his ribs moving as he breathed, and his abdominal muscles move in and out against my flabby ones. I breathed in his scent, (which smells of apple juice, by the way) and I looked up to face him, my chin resting on his chest.

“Its great to finally see you.” I widened my smile, looking up at the sunglasses. I wish I could see his eyes.

“Me too bro.” he answered, “Me too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> John is such a school girl.. Forgive me.


	4. Requiem for the Cake Batter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dave's first night at the Egbert house hold is cake filled an unexpected.
> 
> Dadbert has snazzy pajamas. 
> 
> Dave is sick of Con Air and the Spice Girls.
> 
> John's prank was stupid

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my head cannon is that John watched the Vancouver Olympics
> 
> The first section were they were watching LOTR was written after a chem test… so its more like a bonus! Also, some sections are a bit awkward.. whoopsies!
> 
> Also, I am really sorry for my absence, I have been busy with life, and life sometimes sucks. Please enjoy!

Later that day I watched Lord of the Rings with Egderp, and noticed how he stiffened up when the first notes of “Requiem for a Tower” started to play.  
“This song makes you feel badass, doesn’t it?” he glanced towards me.   
“I guess.”  
“Come on, Dave!” John nudged. “Like when the chorus part starts playing? Don’t you feel badass just sitting here on the couch? Oh, did you know I can play this song on the piano?” he beamed proudly, his fingers drumming in tone to the theme song.  
I nodded my head along to the impressive drumming, and John gave me a ‘I told you so’ look.  
I chose to ignore it.  
By the end, we were humming along to it loudly, sounding like fools.  
John was waving his hands along to the song, ignoring the movie completely. I just kept to nodding my head.  
“Hey, did you know?” John started.  
“Yeah?” I asked.  
“During the Vancouver Olympics, a Canadian figure skating pair skated to this song!” he smiled.  
“Dude, you watch the Olympics?” I raised an eyebrow.  
“Well, since Vancouver isn’t that far away, it kind of felt special to watch it back then, you know, ‘cause it felt like a neighbor was hosting the Olympics!”  
“I see.”  
We watched in awe as Smeagol squawked his way through the movie, and our platonic crush on Legolas was revealed when we both proclaimed that he had the flowing hair of a god.

Later that night, Dadbert made lasagna for dinner, and for dessert baked a three layer coconut cake from scratch. I ate three fucking slices of that awesome masterpiece, mostly for John because he refused to eat a single bite. Even if it wasn't from a Betty Crocker mix.

“This is great Mr. Egbert.” I proclaimed, forking another mouthful. God it felt like tropical angels blessed me with coconut.  
“Thank you, Dave.” Dadbert smiled, “John, eat a piece.”  
“Never!” shouted Egbert. He scooped a handful of cake. His eyes narrowed.  
“Uh John?” I warily eyed the hand.  
“For America!” he yelled his battle cry, and flung the cake towards his dad. The elder Egbert successfully dodged the flying sweet, and pulled out a chunk of cake as well.  
“Think you can out do me son?” he taunted, and successfully sent the cake straight to his son’s face.  
“Gah, Dad! I just showered!” John winced, and proceeded to grab another piece. 

“Dave!” both Egberts called out, “Grab a piece!”  
I smirked, and in both hands grabbed a chunk. The soft sponginess of the cake and icing oozed between my fingers, and I took a mock stance.  
“Be prepared John. Mr. Egbert.”  
Ammo in hand, I expertly flung the sponge cake into the faces of both Egberts.  
“Dave!” John glared, icing coating his glasses. I only wiggled my eyebrows in reply.  
I used my strifing skills to good use, using the techniques to dodge Bro’s attacks with avoiding flying cakes flung from left and right.  
In the end I was left with less ‘casualties’ while the other two looked as though they survived a cake factory explosion.

“Well done, Dave.” Dadbert grinned towards me, and patted John’s back(smearing some more cake on him, that sneaky genius).   
It took half an hour to clean up the mess plus ourselves, and afterwards back in John’s bedroom, he forced me to watch Con Air.

“Dude it’s awesome!” John argued, as he popped in the disk.  
“Ew, no man.” I wrinkled my nose slightly.  
“Who cares!” John pulled out something.  
"At least I got this! You have to watch it with this around!"   
In his hand held the bunny I gave him years ago.  
"You still kept it?” I toyed with it’s greasy paw. Nic Cage rubbed this toy against his sweaty chest. Now that I think about it... Ew.

“Well duh man! It’s the Con Air Bunny!” I saw his grin.  
The opening credits started playing, and John started to watch it intently.  
I left him alone while I barely paid any attention, instead sneakily studying the adorable dork laying next to me on the floor.  
He created a cocoon made of thick blankets, and I assumed that he was sensitive to the cold, or thought it was cosy.  
The blue eyes watched the screen as though their lives where depended on it. The buck teeth bit his lower lip in concentration, eyebrows knitting together at times. I was itching to take a picture of it.

“No, Cage, no.” he muttered under his breath, and even shed tears when the protagonist greeted his loving wife and daughter.  
“I’ve got a present for you, Casey.” Cage spoke, trying to hand the little blond girl the damn bunny. The girl clung to her mom’s side.

“Caaaaaaaage.” John cried out, hugging the dirty bunny. “Casey take the bunny!” he wailed.  
At the end of the movie Egbert buried himself deep into the blanket cocoon, muttering about the power of fatherly love or something.

I pulled out the spare mattress and made my bed using spare bed sheets Dadbert had provided earlier.  
“Dave you going to sleep?” a whisper sounded from the blankets.  
“Yeah dude. It’s two o’clock in the morning for me.” I responded. “Also, you have school tomorrow.” I grabbed my PJ’s and started towards the bathroom. I decided to take a shower as well.  
I heard a loud groan, and the blankets muttered, “School sucks.”  
“I know.” I replied.

Once in the bathroom, I turned on the faucet for the shower, and I asked John where he kept his spare bath towels. There was one, but it was still slightly damp.

“Its in the cabinet.” John called out.

“Aight.” I hummed, and just as I opened the little door I heard John shout,

“OH SHIT DAVE DON’T OPEN IT!”

It was too late.

A confetti cannon exploded, and a water balloon shot and landed on my face.

And instead of water, the balloon was filled with cake batter. Betty Crocker cake batter.

“JOHN EGBERT!” 

My yell was a lot louder than it should have been. Well, fuck it, my face, hair, and shirt was coated with sticky cake batter!

He was going to pay.

~

I stuck my head out when I heard him leave. I yawned, and stretched my stiff muscles. It all felt like a dream. Dave Strider was in my house. Dave Strider is now in my bathroom. My best bro from another state finally came.

“Yo Egbert.” I heard him cry out, “Where are the spare towels?”

“In the cabinet.” I answered. Cabinet... Cabinet…

Oh no. The cabinet.

I shot out of my blanket nest, and stumbled as I shouted for Dave to not open the cabinet door.  
But it was too late. I heard the explosion of the cannon, and then a splat of cake batter.

“JOHN EGBERT!”

I winced. Dave was mad. Really, really mad.

“Gotcha this time!” I laughed nervously. Maybe if I laughed it off he wouldn’t attempt to kill me... Right?

I heard him stomp in, and it was a marvelous sight. Dave Strider, the cool kid, had Betty Crocker cake batter on his face, the gloop stuck in his hair, a few splatters on his shirt. Confetti stuck to the batter, and the sight of it was just… Hilarious!

I couldn’t stop the giggles that erupted from my mouth, and soon giggles turned to a laughing fit, where I was rolling around in bed. 

“Egbert.” the sunglasses glowered.

“Yes… Dave?” I snorted.

“This is so not funny.”

“But it is!!!” I squealed. Okay its so girly and silly that I squealed, but I couldn’t help it. 

“Stop your squealing, Egbert. There will be consequences.” 

“Like what?” I challenged.

Instead of answering the blond walked up to me, and grabbed my arm. Before I could say a word, he covered my mouth with his freehand, and shushed me.

I watched as he removed his hand from my arm, and took a scoop of the batter from his face.

Then smeared it onto my face.

“Dave!” I complained. But it sounded like a muffled mess, since his hand was in the way.  
“Oh John.” Dave smirked, “Now your face is covered by shitty batter too.” 

“I hate you.” I glared.

“Love ya too.”

Dave then got up and went to take his shower.

Now my face had some batter on it. Why Crocker why.

~

I vigorously scrubbed my face once I entered the hot rain, and made sure to clean my sunglasses as well.

Dave Strider, you are screwed. I growled to myself. I just gotten myself pranked, and wanted John to pay for it. No one messes with a Strider. But yet, seeing my friend’s reaction and adorable laughter caused me to not go all bat shit crazy on him.

I grabbed the bar of soap, and lathered my fingers with it. The smell of dove filled the air as I tried to get rid of the stupid batter. My sunglasses were washed in the sink before, and dried carefully. I used John’s shampoo, which smelled of blueberry. 

“Very manly, John.” I muttered, weaving my shampoo coated fingers through my hair. Augh. The stupid Betty Crocker monster got into my golden strands. 

After turning the water off, I got out. When I was finished thoroughly wiping myself off with the towel, I put on my PJ’s (they had the broken record pattern if you wanted to know) and walked my way over to John’s room. 

John glared at me as we walked past each other, and I thought I heard him say something about killing me if I used up all of the hot water.

And to be annoying, I swear once he got in the shower he started to sing the stupid Spice Girl’s song, “If You Wanna Be My Lover.”

“Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want.”

Oh god, John no.

“So tell me what you want, what you really really want.  
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really  
really really wanna zigazig ah.” he sang loudly. He even went out of his way to hit a high note.

“John stop it!” I yelled out. I glanced at the clock. It was almost twelve forty. Dadbert might come out of his room and flip shit or something.

“Baby you light up my world like nobody else!” John shouted/sang back. Thats it. I walked up the the bathroom door, and knocked on the wood.

“John I see that you are a great singer, but just shut up, your dad might wake up!” I hissed, and growled when I heard him hum that one sappy song... What was it? Oh no. Not Taylor Swift! The enemy.

My eyes behind the aviators narrowed. I thought I heard a shuffle coming from his father’s room.

“John, your dad!” I hissed loudly.

Then I heard the door behind me crack open.

“John?” 

I turned around.

Dadbert, looking snazzy in a business suit like pajamas, walked over to the door. He placed a finger to his lips, and glanced at me. I thought I saw him wink.

“John.” he murmured.

Immediately the singing stopped.

“Da-dad?” I heard a squeak.

“Yes John. This is your father speaking.” he fished something out of his pocket. He pulled out something. Was that a skeleton key?

Eyes wide, I heard his father quietly fiddle with the bathroom door lock, and spoke loudly about something when the lock clicked.

Out of nowhere held in his hand was a bottle of shaving cream.

He went inside.

I heard screaming as the door closed, and fizzing as the contents of the spray were released.

I left the crazy duo alone. I needed my beauty sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will post the next chapter is a few hours probably because I feel oh so guilty.... my tumblr is ectomintycocoa please follow for more updates on this fanfic and others that I am planning on writing.


	5. Dave Stri the Smartass Guy (a.k.a. Justin Beiber haunts my day dreams)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dave goes to school with John. John realises how much of a smart ass the Strider truly is… In person.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My head cannon for Dave is: to avoid getting into random strifes and being attacked by flying projectiles (aka smuppets) Bro promised Dave that he wouldn't mess with him when he is studying. So he actually studies a lot and is very knowledgeable on certain subjects. 
> 
> I read Farewell to Arms in my junior year last year, and I really enjoyed it…  
> I DON'T OWN HOMESTUCK

“Dude, chill. It was funny.” Dave chuckled, as we were walking our way to the bus stop.

“Shut up, Strider. I seriously hate you right now.” I glared. Fuck him. Fuck Dave Strider, with his cool attitude, glasses, and fashion sense.

“Like the jacket? Got it at Zumies.” He smirked noticing me.I felt underdressed with my sweater and hoodie.

It was a nightmare. Having my dad come through the door, spraying me with the highly flammable shaving cream. It was my fault for singing at the top of my lungs, to stupid songs. And waking him up.

As I was hatching up a revenge plan, my bus pulled up. Today was friday. One more day of this hell, and hello break.

I swiped my metrocard, while Dave used some change. We sat at the back, and I went into my usual routine, which was to stare at the gray, foggy landscape of houses and trees, watching the scenery while driving past the lake, and the ruins of the Betty Crocker factory(seeing where the once cursed building stood always made a smile on my face. I am forever thankful for the meteor).

Dave put on his headphones, and tuned out the world with what seemed to be his own beats. Pompous bastard. Listening to his own fucking music. I wondered randomly if that Bieber guy did the same. He seemed to be a douche. Maybe he did.

_SWAGGIEEEEEEEE_

I blinked from my nightmare-ish daydream. Dave glanced at me, probably because my face was in some horrific expression I guess. The bus driver was honking on her horn, and I guess somehow Justin Bieber mixed with the honking and… Swaggie was born??

I shook my head, trying to shake it away. Dave kept on watching me, probably judging me silently, and ‘ironically.’ I saw that the next bus stop was hell- I mean school, and I got ready to leave. Dave taking this as a cue, got his backpack ready too. I had no idea why, but he seemed to have stuff from his other school. I guessed he was just going to work on his homework during class?

The pavement was wet with the morning dew, and the angry gray of the clouds make it seem as though it may rain. I hope not. I forgot my umbrella.

I led Dave into the dreary brick school, letting the warm air comfort me as I gave my best bro a glance.

~~

As soon as we got into the bus John went into this stare-at-the-window-like-the-adorable-dork-he-is mode(Nah just spacing out). I put on my headphones blasting some music. I played some of my beats, to pick apart the different chords and keys, to see what needed improvement. Perhaps vocals and some random piano notes might make this one song a bit better. I mapped out the song in my head. I was in deep, deep thought until I heard a “Bluh!”

I turned to see John, with the silliest expression on his face. He looked disgusted, or like he tasted something awful. Maybe he snapped from his daydream because of the busdriver. She blasted her horn when some car cut in front or something.

I tried to give my best “Dude, what’s up with you?” face, but he didn’t seem to notice. Oh well.

John started to gather his things, and I did the same. Soon we got off the bus, facing a decent sized school.

The school was one of those old fashioned brick schools, with a sign on the wall, with big steel doors. It was different from my city school, which was suited for the urban, ‘modern’ era. But this school for some reason screamed ‘Egbert’. Don’t ask.

As he led me through the fluorescent lit halls, he brought me to his locker, turning the dial lazily. “I wish this day was over already, Dave.” he complained, stifling a yawn. His locker door had a Nic Cage poster, and a small box stored inside labeled, ‘portable magic chest’.

“Oh Egbert. Pranking in school, are we?” I accused.

He had a face displaying mock remorse as he replied, “Yeah... You should have seen last April.”

“Oh I wish I did.” I smirked slightly.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw people staring at the two of us. They whispered to each other, eyeing my Strider ass probably. My coolkid charm was probably too much for this dreary hellhole.

John beckoned for me to put my bag inside his locker as well, and mentioned that I should bring something to do for the two classes we have to attend before break. I nodded, and grabbed my math homework.

“Any teachers I should worry about?” I asked, walking next to him as we proceeded to his first class.

John put a finger on his chin. “Hm, I’m not sure. Maybe Mrs. Brickley, my science teacher. She’s strict.”

“Aiight.” I nodded.

We entered a brightly lit classroom, and a nice looking lady was busy writing on the blackboard(seriously, who uses blackboards these days? My school at least has the white boards and the occasional smart board).

She turned facing us with a smile, but her eyebrows knitted in confusion as she noted that I was not her average student.

“Hello John.. Who is your friend? A new student?”

John blinked, and tried to answer, but I cut him off.

“Sorry ma’am.” I started, layering the Strider smoothness as I spoke, “I’m Dave, John’s friend from Texas. I came to school with him today if you don’t mind. I have a note from my brother, and John’s father if you need it.” I pulled out my note. Shit. I forgot to go to the main office to get me a visitor’s pass.

The woman’s eyes brightened. “Oh no, hun, its alright. Here, take this pass, and go to the main office. Take the hall straight down, fifth door from your right.”

She handed a pink, paper pass with a scribbled signature, and she made John sit down. He reserved a empty seat next to me by putting one of his jackets there. How kind.

I did a mock salute, and waltzed my way to the main office.

~~

I forgot to get Dave cleared up for class! Darn, I forgot! I scolded myself silently, as I watched the blond give me a mock salute. What a dork.

I felt a pair of eyes bore into me from behind, and I turned to see some girl’s staring at me.

“John.” one of them whispered.

“Yeah?” I forgot her name.

“Is... he really your friend?” What a mean girl.

“Yes. He is. His name is Dave if you wanted to know.” I felt a bit protective.

“He… seems cool.” she looked like she wanted to say something else, her and her friend’s eyes were filled to the brim with curiosity, but I left her hanging. Besides, the teacher started the lesson.

At least twenty minutes into the lesson the said blond opened the door, with a loud neon sticker labeled, ‘Guest’ displayed proudly on his chest.

He gave a quick nod to the teacher, and strode to the next seat I reserved next to me, and smoothly sat himself down. My teacher seemed to not mind the sunglasses. I think the note from bro explained his ‘sensitive’ eyes. Sensitive my ass. He just wanted to look cool and I know it.

“Well, in the book Farewell to Arms, Fredrick was given a Saint Anthony figurine by Catherine. Any idea why this was ironic?” the teacher asked. Her chestnut colored irises scanned the students for anyone who was willing to state their opinion. I had no idea. I didn’t bother to read that chapter. Hell, I never even bothered with Hemingway.

She seemed desperate as she pleaded with us, “Come on guys! It was for homework. One of you should know.”

I had a idea that a certain smartass did in fact read fucking Hemingway. Dave’s fingers were drumming on his desk. He looked well, frustrated.

I nudged him as he glanced in my direction. “You read it dude? You know what she’s asking?”

I swear he was rolling his eyes behind the aviators. “Duh. I read this a month ago. The guy’s writing is more out there and more clear than my random rapping.”

“Well then smartass, what about you answer it?” I hissed. Fucking smartass blond.

His eyebrow was raised, and a ghost of a smile played his lips. Oh gog was he doing it?

He raised his hand proudly, his pale fingers waving a bit to catch her attention.

“Dave?” she raised an eyebrow. “You wish to answer it?”

“If you don’t mind of course.” Dave smiled a bit. She gave him a ‘okay’ and he smiled again, and I was positive he looked at me, as though he was saying something like, _‘I’m not even in this fucking class and yet I am answering a question on something you should have read about. How ironic is that.’_ He then answered the question. “Catherine gave Lt. Henry the medal because she wanted him to be protected and safe… Which was ironic, because he got hurt in battle, plus lost the charm after he was wounded. Which meant that the saint did a rather lousy job of protecting the guy, and that Hemingway believes that religion has little effect on the violence of war.”

Every eye in the classroom was on Strider, and he went back to his slouch, scribbling on his paper- something about math. Dismissing everyone.

My teacher cleared her throat, her eyes blinking in surprise. “Well, I guess our guest was right… Well done. I assume you read it before. Class, any more thoughts?”

No one uttered a word. Probably not. Because we got our ass handed to us by a cool kid from Texas who probably did this for the sake of irony.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed dave strider being a smartass
> 
> Also please check out my other story, the art of a burrito!(shameless self promoting) its a fun John Dave story, and its just those two durps goofing around. I might make a series out of short stories of John and Dave simply being best bros and derping around. 
> 
> My inner hopeless romantic may be seen in the next chapter I warned you in advance. God Dave why.


	6. So I watched the smartass blonde kick ass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dave helps out John with math homework, and someone rains on their parade.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also some rather vulgar language, so I'm going to warn you VULGAR LANGUAGE AHEAD. With a slice of smart ass.
> 
> BUT I added some fluff to make up for it yay

After my thoughts on the Saint Anthony shit, I went back to my homework. Yes world, Dave fucking Strider gives a shit about school. Why? Cause I can’t get into college and get my degree in awesome, that's why. So back off.

I felt the stares of people. Proves them right for neglecting Hemingway. I should fist bump him once I reached heaven. Or wherever the hell he is.

After class I followed the ravenette boy to his next class, and on the way he abruptly stopped and faced me.

“What the heck was that, Dave?” He questioned me.  
“I dunno, I thought, hey no one seems to know this shit, maybe I can answer. So I did.” I replied.

“I never expected this.” John rolled his eyes. “You never seemed to be the type to… You know, study. Or pay attention in class.”

Seriously, did I give that kind of an impression? “Well,” I pursed my lips, “Maybe it is for the sake of irony. We will never know.”

I left him standing as his complained, “Daaave!” played in my ears. Ahh sweet, sweet revenge. Upstanding Egbert as a smartass, to get back for last night. I was letting him off easy you see.

We entered the next classroom, and I flashed my neon guest label to the teacher. He answered with a ‘hmph’. I knew we would get along beautifully.

This turned out to be math class, and during the guy’s lecture I ended up appreciating the Texas school system because I learned this shit two months ago. But, I ended up finishing my math homework during the time anyway. I smiled in triumph. One down, baby.

John groaned as he tried to work on a class assignment. He poked his face with the eraser end of the pencil, trying to solve the problem.

Feeling like a douche, I leaned to him and whispered, “Hey ‘lil Egbert let me whisper in yo ear.”  
Smiling I finished, “Multiply that by fifty.” and went back to my slouching position. Plastic seats were uncomfortable in any desk, any seat across the nation. That is the one thing that stayed the same. God bless.

The bright blue irises eyed me warily, but did so. His eyebrows were raised as he turned to me in a dorky grin. “Well Dave you were right!” I gave a slight smile. Damn right.

So he finished the rest as I occasionally guided him like a guardian angel, and he was the first to finish.

The teacher gave a faint smile as he scanned Egderp’s paper, proclaiming, “Why Mr.Egbert, this must be a first! All the questions are correct. Good job.”

I felt like a proud father, damn it.

The buck toothed boy had a bounce in his step as he walked back to his seat, and beamed a megawatt smile. I felt flattered.  
I fought my urge to ease my poker face and say something like, “Good job Egbert, bro hug!” Cause Strider’s don’t do that. Strider’s don’t give pats-on-the-backs. We don’t even smile for such a stupid reason. But it was John. And I wanted to. But I didn’t.

Afterwards was a short break between classes, and the prankster bounced his way to his locker. It was amusing how happy this boy could be from such a small deal. Getting praised by teachers is nothing, well at least to me. A gold star on the goodie twoshoes chart never made me proud either, even if that was an awful example to compare to.

I was dragged out from my thoughts when I saw the boy trip in front of me.

I quickly reached out and grabbed his arm, slowing his fall as he slid down in a weird, twisty motion, but landed on his bum safely. His sky blue eyes shook in surprise, darting to the source of his fall. It was a stupid foot.

~~  
I was proud.

Okay, it was completely ridiculous that I should be so overjoyed at the fact that I finished my work quickly, and got all praised by my math teacher, but... It never happened before! And I guess another major reason was because Dave helped me. He assisted me in math, and I thought it was cool of him to do so. 

Even if he did give me pointers in the most ironic ways possible, it still was understandable.

Lost in my happy world, I did not notice the foot placed in the way of my legs....

And I tripped.

But a hand shot out and grabbed my flailing arm, and I ended up in a sitting position instead of flat-faced on the floor. Dave stopped my fall. My eyes were dazed for a moment, but started to scan my surroundings, looking for the person whose foot may have caused me certain death- or pain.

There was Justin. One of the jerks who bothered me ever since April Fools. Boy, he’s had it out for me since I pranked him good. He glared at me with his piggy eyes, and snorted.

I knew it was him. Only he would wear those silly Nike shoes. Who likes the color neon turquoise but him?

My best friend seemed to notice my eye exchange with Justin, and he turned to face the bully, while grabbing my arm and carefully pulling me up. “You tripped my bro?” he asked coolly.

“So? That fag deserved it.”

I winced. How rude. Well, today was better than usual. One time his ‘shove’ landed me into a trashcan… The other time the jock wrote “whore” on my locker. Made no sense really, but that still stabbed a splinter on my self esteem. His small beatings were not of a regular occurrence, but it made school a lot more worse than it should have been. 

“Fag? A cigarette?” Dave spat.

“Cigarette? No, you fucking idiot, it means he’s a dirty homo.” Justin sneered.

Dave arched an eyebrow, but I thought I saw a dark aura rise around him. Maybe I hit my head.  
“I hope you know, fucking dumbass,” Dave replied, “Fag means a cigarette. Faggot means a bundle of sticks. Only stupid assholes like you can even think that fag means homosexual.” he walked right up to the jerk.  
“No one messes with my bro.” he grabbed a fistful of the retreating boy’s t-shirt. “And don’t you dare call him a dirty homo. Don’t call anyone that, you fucking sack of pathetic shit.” With an effortless shove, he pushed the boy away from him, having him land against the lockers.

A deep growl erupted from Justin’s throat, and he ran to Dave, a fist held high in the air, ready to punch him. But Dave easily dodged the rough teen, as though he was reading his movements. Well, I did remember him saying something about strifes on the rooftop with his bro almost everyday....

Justin attempted to hit Dave again, and the blond once again swiftly dodged the attack, and placed a smart blow to the boy’s stomach, and a second one to his chest. He then swung around and did a roundhouse kick to finish the job, making it look like an art. Without breaking a sweat he single-handedly took down the boy, making it seem so easy.

My heart was thumping loudly as he took my hand and led me away from the mess, leaving a coughing, angry jock behind.

“Dave, what was that?” I asked breathlessly. 

But he still kept on walking until we were far from anyone else. He then turned to me and asked, “Bro you alright? Are you hurt?” He patted the sides of my shoulders for emphasis. 

“No, Dave! I’m fine actually.” I smiled, but my grin wavered when I saw his facial expression… Which looked sad.

“Dave?” I asked. “Dave?”

~~

“Dave?” I heard the boy ask. “Dave?” he repeated again. I can’t believe I just did that. I lost my cool. Because no one messes with my best bro! Because John is my best bro, and nothing more… Right? I almost beat the living shit out of that dumb asshole! I could have killed him if I wanted to. I can go back and break the bones in his body without even blinking a delicate eyelash in remorse. 

I never lost my cool before. Not like this. Striders don’t do that. Yet this boy here is making me break all of the damn rules.

“Yeah, yeah, John don’t get your delicate panties in a twist, just wanted to make sure you’re fine.” I sighed. “But that kid bothers you?”

John winced a bit. “Yeah….” But his eyes dulled as he then added quickly, “But… it was my fault! I provoked him!”

Confused, I asked him why. He replied quickly, “Well, during April Fool’s I pranked him! I’m not telling you what I did, but I pranked him good! But, he got mad you see, I never chose a particular target that day, it was more like he was in the wrong place at the wrong time. And I was just nearby and he just put the pieces together…”

“Oh, John.” I groaned. “You dug your own grave huh?”

He only replied with a sheepish smile, and I found it endearing. 

“Yeah, but he kind of teased me before. Not much though. Just like, calling me ‘four eyes’ or other names. Never really felt bothered by it. But I guess he thought I was aiming for him, you know?”

I let go of his shoulders and put my arms akimbo. “But still, he bothered you in the end, even before he fell victim to your prank. So that asshole deserved that beating then, huh?”

John giggled. “I guess so!”

We walked back to his locker so he could retrieve the supplies for his next class, and I did the same. Had to finish my English assignment.  
We got some stares as we walked by, and whispers. I kept on hearing the name ‘Justin’, so I assumed that the boy that I beat up was named Justin. Huh. I heard from the people we walked by that he got some sprains, and bruises. Really? I didn’t hit him that hard, did I? I thought I went easy on that son of a bitch. But then again comparing that douche to Bro was like comparing a chipmunk to a bad ass honey badger... did that make any sense? No? That's what I thought.

A bunch of girls were looking at me, and I edged myself closer to John. He noted the distance between us with a look. Oh, so little John doesn’t want me to be so close? Well…  
I swung my left arm around his shoulders, earning a “Dave!” which I smirked to in reply. “Did I mention that I am a hugger?” I watched the ebony haired boy squirm from my gasp. But I didn’t let him go. It was fun to watch him.

“Come on bro, we’re best friends!” I added, “Best bro’s do this shit, right?”

“Ahh… I dunno.” John admitted, but stayed in my grasp.

“So,” he started, as we walked to his science class, “You’re a hugger, huh Strider? Care to explain?”

I only chuckled in reply.

~~  
My heart thudded as I realised that Dave was all concerned for me. It made me happy that he beat up the stupid jock but... I felt bad. The guy never saw it coming, and he didn’t have a chance. I wondered randomly if he would only get angry and come after me in the end, all for revenge. I hope not. 

As I was taking my stuff out of my locker and closed it, I felt eyes on me. People were watching me as I walked with Dave, and heard their gossip. 

I also noticed that some girls were checking Strider out. I mean, if I was a girl, I guess I would do the same… Uh… No homo.

The blond seemed to have noticed this as well. I felt him scoot a bit closer to me, and I gave him a confused look. He wasn’t doing this on purpose… Right?

Then I felt a warm arm stretch itself across my shoulders and my stomach felt like it was invaded by butterflies. I tried not to blush, as I squeaked, “Dave!”

I only got a reply, and I learned that Dave was a hugger. When I asked him about it, I only got a deep chuckle in reply.

Science class. That one class with the sour teacher, Mrs.Brickley. She was… alright. But in a bad mood she can cause a storm of crushed self esteem.

Dave flashed his neon label again, and the teacher just squinted her eyes, and gave a dismissive wave. “John, please tell your friend to sit on the corner of your lab bench. Your lab partner should be coming....”

Ten minutes later my lab partner didn’t come. Damn it.

Mrs.Brickley glared at the empty seat, and then shifted her beady eyes until they met Dave, who was busy scribbling down his english work.

“Ahem. Mr. Strider.”

Dave glanced up, his covered eyes watching the teachers.

“It seems your friend, Mr. Egbert, has no lab partner, and everyone has one... Be his lab partner for today.”

“Yes mam.” Dave gave a faint smile, before returning to his signature pokerface.

“So, Egderp.” he scooted into the chair next to me.

“Yeah Strider?”

“Looks like I’m going to be your lab partner. Shit, it reminds me of that one awful vampire movie Bro forced me to watch.”

“Twilight? You mean when they were doing the bio lab?”

“Shit, Egbert, you knew that?” Dave pretended to have a mock heart attack.

“Shut up, it was popular in middle school.” I glared.

“Yeah, yeah, I know.” The sunglasses reflected the fluorescent lights above. 

“Plus, this is chemistry class. And we’re working with acids, not some cells.” I snorted, and began measuring the chemicals, and asked the blond to jot down notes as I said liquid measurements, and finally added the chunks of zinc to the acid.

The test tube turned hot as the mixture fizzed, and I watched in interest. The zinc disappeared once the boiling, angry bubbles stopped, and I mouthed, “cool” to Dave.

He smirked at me, and finished scribbling down notes, and gave them to me. He drew Sweet Bro on the side, with Hella Jeff on the other. “Damn bubbles yo.” he wrote on the side. I swore he winked at me, when I gave the paper to the teacher. She seemed to scoff at the crude drawings, but I got the lab done so what more can she ask from me?

Class ended quietly, and I couldn’t wait for lunch.… Even if I had another class before that.

~~

I walked in with John on my arm, and I saw the bitter looking teacher, her thin, wiry hair tied into a small, messy bun. Thin lips pressed together in a hard line. Her eyes had lost all brightness, and were left with a dull blue. Not like John’s vibrant, sky blue. A deep gash of purple lined under her eyes, making her overall tone ashen and sad.

I showed her the sticker, and she just waved me off, having me sit on the corner of the lab table next to John. Not an official seat you see. But, the lab partner was absent, and as though Jegus himself had blessed me, I was allowed to be the derp’s lab partner.

It was that acid and zinc lab, the one that makes the bottom of the test tube all hot and the mixture just boils and bubbles. But the look on my bro’s face was priceless. His eyes were bright, filled with wonder, his mouth in a wide, buck toothed smile, and he mouthed to me as though he was saying, “cool”. I had to smirk to respond. This boy was fucking adorable.

As I finished writing down the notes, I did a quick sketch of SBAHJ. I added, “Damn bubbles yo.” and handed the sheet to John. As the ravenette walked away to hand in the paper, I winked at him. Well… what's the point of fucking winking when he couldn’t see it? Oh well.

The next class after that went by in a big blur, and soon the bell for lunch rang. 

“I buy lunch on fridays… Is that cool with you?” John asked, as he pulled out his wallet. “I’ll pay for you, don’t worry.”

“Aiight.” I nodded, and he led to the the cafeteria. It was a smelly, boring place with multiple rows of tables, with the seats connected to the sides. Painted signs decorated the walls, and a couple of teachers walked around, surveying the premises. It reminded me of prison.

“This way, Dave! I think today they have…” John squinted as he read the menu printed on the side, “Chicken sandwich, bean burrito, California Salad, Barbeque beef… With a side of a small salad, assorted vegetables, or apple sauce.”

“Oh shit, they have the sauce?” I joked.

“I guess.” John giggled, and we waited in line.

“So no pizza?” I asked, and I was slightly disappointed to learn that the generic cafeteria food was unavailable. 

“Only on Mondays and Tuesdays.” John told me.

He got the chicken sandwich, and although an insult to my Texan roots, I chose the Barbecue beef. I grabbed the applesauce, and added it onto my tray. John got himself some baby carrots.

After paying he led me to an isolated table on the back, the one with doodles of dicks and chicken scratch of random sayings and, “U SUK” etched on the surface. “It’s the most quiet spot here.” John explained, as I traced the ridiculous message with my finger.

“You like the D’s drawn here?” I teased.

John’s face blushed bright red, and he snapped back, “That’s disgusting!” and angrily bit into his sandwich with aggression. Damn.

“Sorry dude.” I muttered, and took a bite. And it tasted bad. Yuck. I gingerly put the beef back into the plate. Applesauce must save me now.

John eyed my beef, asking, “Dude, you only had one bite! Waste of food.” 

I stuck my tongue out. “It tasted like shit and was a complete insult to my Texan roots.” the applesauce wasn't half bad.

The blue eyes rolled sarcastically, and then his phone beeped. He took the phone out of his pocket, and his eyebrows knitted together in concentration, but immediately relaxed.

He looked up, his eyes electrified, and shoved the phone to my face.

“Jade says hi! And she wants a picture of us hanging out right now!” he grinned.

“Oh, so she wants some homo action, is that it?” I teased.

“Dude! No! She isn’t into that stuff!” John huffed, slapping my arm.

“Yeah, yeah, okay, lets take some selfies, shall we?” I scooted closer to John.

He pressed himself against me, so our faces can appear on the screen. “Funny face?” John asked.   
“Whatever, dude.” I replied.  
So John stuck out his tongue, flared his nose, and wiggled his eyebrows, while I just stuck out my tongue. Silly enough. The phone took the picture, and then he suggested “smoldering look” and we both just lowered our chins and looked “intently” at the phone camera. I then thought of just regular faces. John agreed. Jade needed at least one normal picture. He gave a genuine smile, and I eased my poker face just a bit. Afterwards I just told him to take a picture in three seconds. He looked confused but he said yes.

I was going to do this.

Not for the fucking irony.

But for the sake of Jade… And me.

“Ready Egbert?” I asked nonchalantly. 

“In three?” he nodded.

“One.” I brought my head closer to John’s face. I also dropped my arm around his shoulder.

“Two.” I leaned a bit back, facing the side of his head.

“Three.” As the phone took the picture, I leaned in all the way and kissed John’s head, my chin burying itself into his soft hair and my lips pressed gently on his scalp. I even closed my eyes, even though I knew that Harley wouldn’t see my eyes closed anyway. 

“Dave!” he shrieked, and when I saw the picture I saw his mouth was shaped like a ‘O’, and a pink blush was seeping through his cheeks. Giving Harley some fucking fanservice.

“Giving Harley some fanservice, dude.” I explained, as I noticed that John was feeling the place where I kissed his hair with his hand.

“Oh. Okay.”  
God, he is so fucking cute.

Too bad I had to cover the action… I had to thank Harley later. Otherwise I could never pull that shit off.

“Lets send these, shall we?” I eyed John, and took a casual scoop of applesauce.

“Alright.” I thought I heard… disappointment?

~~

Oh god.

Dave just… Kissed me.

Well, my head, but I felt it. Oh my Jegus Dave Strider just kissed my head. Even if it was just for a photo. And probably for irony.

I hope he couldn’t hear my overwhelming disappointment, because that would make me a tool and that is not okay. 

I sent Jade the pictures, and a few minutes later I got a whole boat load of messages of, “Lucky! I want to be there! :D” and, “Cute guys!” also, “Haha trying to be sexy there? XD” 

And then one message came. “John. You must be happy now~ Its nice to see you guys are like this!! Finally! Sending the pics to Rose too! She would totally love them!! Bye!”

My heart thudded as I wondered what she meant. She didn’t answer when I spammed her questions and her name.

That girl did not respond. Why.

Dave went back to eating his applesauce like nothing happened. Maybe nothing did. I was probably overthinking it. Way too much. I had to remind myself that Dave is all ‘no homo’ and so am I. Damn it, why?!

I went back to eating my burger, and once again I noticed some girls from the popular table eyeing the Strider. Maybe it was the jacket? Or the sun shiny flair that he had? Maybe that’s what makes him so favorable in this cloudy town.

Which reminds me….  
“Dave?” I asked.

“Yeah Egderp?”

I fiddled with my fingers as I lowered my sandwich. “Are you popular at your school?”

He stopped his spoon half way as he replied, “I dunno dude. I just stand there and some people just come and say hi and stuff. I go to parties occasionally. Not much though, cause Bro can come in at any minute and embarrass the hell outta me. Like a regular group of girls come and say stuff to me, but I shake them off.” he tapped his chin as he added, “I was in this one music-arts group and stuff. I mostly do shit online though.”

“You have any good friends?” I muttered, studying the half eaten lunch of mine.

“I have some… But you, Harley, and Lalonde are the closest I have ever had.”

“Really?” I glanced up.

“Yeah. Its hard to make friends when you have a crazy Bro who loves to just pop in and strife with you.”

I giggled. “Dude, your Bro is insane.”

“I know.” He gave a crooked smile.

I proceeded to eat my burger again, munching on the dry patty as I once again thanked the gods for allowing me to meet Dave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own homestuck. (if I did you know my otp would be canon)


	7. Dave not again…

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Their parade is ruined again. (booo)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had a really bad day when writing this, so Dave may not be so 'cannon' like. It got some sappy stuff and all, and if you aren't into that you can kind of skip this chapter I guess? I tried going back to re write this part but I can't seem to do it..

John walked us back to his locker after the last class. He became rather quiet during this time, different from his early bubbly mood earlier. As we neared his locker, we were shocked to find a small crowd surrounding the area.

 

“You think it’s you?” I muttered under my breath.

 

“I hope not.” John whispered back, and quickened his pace.

 

I let him get head, wanting to take my sweet time. The bus won’t come for another twenty minutes anyway.

 

John slipped into the crowd, and for some reason, I felt queasy. My Strider senses were tingling. (Okay, okay, cliche, I know. But who cares, right?)

 

I made my way to where the crowd was, to attempt to get to my best friend.

 

I heard a small squeak, and my head whipped in the direction of his locker.

 

His locker had the words, “Dirty Homo” written in permanent marker, and there was John…

 

Pressed up against the locker door.

 

“Why did you do that, Justin?” he glared, but his voice was soft.

 

“Because your fucking boyfriend beat me up, you little shit!” he roared, jamming the skinny boy against the metal door hard enough to make me clench my fists in anger.

 

People were just watching this happen. Why were they letting this happen? A snarl erupted from my throat. No. Not John. He doesn’t deserve this shit.

 

A large fist was held up in the air, and it came swinging towards the boy.

 

It never made it to its mark.

 

I knew I shouldn’t have done it.

 

I broke a Strider law. I lost my cool again. But this time, I won’t let him off easy.

 

I flash stepped just before he hit John, and grabbed his arm.

 

“Woah, dude.” Justin spun to face me. His eyes were filled with confusion. Good.

 

“You are bothering my bro again?” My voice was deep. It was threatening. It even scared me. Where was my anger and hatred even coming from?

 

I effortlessly flung him away from John, who slid down to the ground, breathing heavily, his eyes wide in shock.

 

“Dave.” He barely managed, and eyed me warily.

 

“John,” my voice was kinder towards him. “I’m going to beat the living shit out of him.”

 

“Don’t Dave. Please. It’s not worth it. He isn’t after you.” he softly countered. John was always a pacifist.

 

“He is provoking me by harming you, bro.” I reasoned. I just wanted him out of harms way. I wanted him in my arms, far away, watching some dumb movie instead of having a jock soon stand up and proceed to swing his arm at me and sock me.  

 

“See?” I smirked softly as I dodged the sloppy punches. This kid was too easy. But Bro would never forgive me if I went all out against this asshole.

 

But I punched his chest, and grabbed him by shoulders. Yanking Justin down before he could react, I shoved my knee against his jaw, and he slumped to the floor in pain. He was cursing while cradling his jaw, in a pathetic ball on the ground. I wanted to kick him in the ribs for good measure, but I saw the look in John’s eyes.

 

It made me freeze in place.

 

His beautiful crystal irises were widened, shaking. They were filled with… fear. Oh my god. I scared John. I fucking scared him to the point where he even cowered away from my touch. He shook me away as he spun the dial of his locker, his knees shaking a bit. I should have stopped. I should have been the bigger man, and not fall into my anger. But I couldn’t. I wanted to protect John, but by doing so I just pushed the boy who was worth it away. I truly hated myself then.

 

Things seemed to worsen when we went outside, because it had begun to rain.

 

John softly murmured that he had forgotten his umbrella. I didn’t mind the rain. It cooled me down, calming my thoughts as each cold drop drenched me.

 

“John…”  I managed to say. Crap, my voice sounded all weak and raspy. But that’s what I probably need right now..

 

“John, I lost my cool there. I am so sorry.” I croaked. Guilt and horror were plaguing my heart, flashbacks of what happened moments ago playing in my mind over and over. I must have looked like a monster to people, my god.

 

“You… Why did you do that, Dave?” he said, looking straight ahead. “I… was happy when you defended me. But at the same time, upset. I saw the look, Dave. The look you gave Justin. You looked so pissed. It wasn't just a little bit of anger… it was pure rage.”

 

“I scared you, didn’t I.” I barely whispered.

 

“I don’t know, Dave!” He whipped around to face me. His sky hued eyes shook, and got all glossy. “I don’t know!” He repeated. “I don’t want you getting hurt, Dave! You don’t need to protect me! Or baby me! I just wanted to meet you, Dave! That’s all I wanted!” he cried, almost in hysterics.

 

“I wanted to protect you, John. I won’t lie about that.” I took a step closer to him. “I hated how that Justin kid was treating you. You are my best bro. I know. You should fight your own battles, do your own work I…” shit this was making me all emotional. Why. The rain wasn’t helping either. “I was so happy to see you. I understand its strange to hear it now.” I added quickly and got close enough to John to place a hand on his shoulder. “I barely have any friends at school. I’m a stupid loner. You know why? Because of my shitty coolkid attitude. I was taught to keep my emotions bundled up, and hide behind a mask. I avoided making friends most of the time. And by the time I wanted some, I was established as fucking cool kid Strider, too cool for anyone! It was hard. People wanted to be with me because of my coolness or some bullshit. But you, John, you and the others on pesterchum. You befriended me. Even with my stupid raps and ridiculous irony crap. You know how much it fucking means to me? And yet here you are, one of the kindest, yet dorkiest people I know. Yeah, sure you’re an occasional asshole, and sure I sometimes hate you for it, but I think people should see what a great person you are, John.”

 

Crap. I said too much.

 

The rain was pouring harder, and we were now both soaking wet. Well, my jacket and his hoodie, that is.

 

John blinked, shocked. Well, I was too. I’ve never said so much before. It feels so foreign. But then again, I’m breaking all the rules for John Egbert.

 

“Dave, I’m sorry.” He spoke under his breath. “I… would have beat the crap out of him too if I was in your shoes!” John broke into a forgiving smile. “Why would I get angry at a wonderful friend like you? You are the best bro a dork like me could ever have.”

 

That moment I grinned. A full out smile. I was forgiven, and I felt… well, appreciated. I’ve never felt any of this before.

 

“Yeah, me and my sexy bod, yo, check it.” I joked, needing a somewhat ironic statement for the moment.

 

“Whatever, Strider, you’re too full of yourself.” He rolled his eyes.

 

“Life’s what you make it, so let’s make it rock.” I smirked.

 

John’s eyes widened. “Dude. Did you fucking quote a Hannah Montana song?”

 

“Yup.” I wiggled my eyebrows, keeping a straight face..

 

The bus finally came, and we sat at the very back, as our soaked clothes dripped. Well. This was quite an interesting school day.

 

John was looking out the window in a daze, and I just leaned back and closed my eyes.

 

_What the hell was happening to me?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I remember when this guy I used to be friends with was kind of possessive and it scared me away, so I feel like John would feel the same way when your best friend goes bezerko and starts beating this stuffing out of someone....
> 
> Yeah I was crappy when I was writing this.
> 
> (p.s. your in love Dave *shakes head* )
> 
> and thus the author's inner sap was revealed!


	8. Dave the emotional singing man-bird

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disney. Singing. Almost smooching. Dave dances weird. Like an emotional bird. If you want to think of an example of this weird dancing look up "Bet on it" the high school musical song.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys I'm updating early so in case I cannot use the computer the next update for this is here!
> 
> Currently I DO NOT HAVE A BETA READER. SHE IS TOO BUSY AND I DON'T WANT TO BOTHER HER.  
> SO IT IS NOT BETAD SO PLEASE EXCUSE ANY SMALL GRAMMAR AND SPELLING MISTAKES.
> 
> I love you all. But not as much as JohnDave.

Dave looked like he was dozing off. Well, I don’t blame him. After all that butt kicking, he must be rather tired.

 

I twiddled my thumbs as the darkened sky gave a rather grim appearance to the surrounding world. Why must it rain all the time? I mean, I got used to it, but it is rather annoying. Especially when you forgot an umbrella. The green landscape was all blurry due to the drops of water running down the glass, and I could see my reflection. My bright eyes stared back at me, and in the corner of my eye I can see Dave. Dave, with his chin resting on his backpack, his arms loosely hugging it. My hair was dripping wet, and I saw droplets of water drip down from Dave’s blond hair, which changed into a darker shade of yellow. A drop ran down from his nose, slid down his lip, and was gone.

 

I looked away because he might notice, and it’s kinda creepy to have someone studying you from a reflection.

 

My eyelids felt heavy, but I saw my bus stop a block away.

 

I nudged Dave with my elbow.

 

“Psst. Dave. Dave.” I whispered. “Wake up.”

 

“Mmm.” he groaned, and shifted his head to face me.

 

“Egbert?” he mumbled.

 

“We’re almost home.” I poked his arm.

 

“Fine, fine, okay.” he stretched from his slouched position, yawning as he did so.

 

I slowly stood up, grabbing ahold of a bar overhead to steady my feet. I stumbled, but Dave’s arm shot up and steadied me. “Careful, bro.” he cautioned sleepily.

 

“Whoops!” I grinned.

 

We got out of the bus after I waved goodbye to Glinda, the busdriver. She is very sweet to me.

 

I led the way home as Dave walked in stride with me, and we quickened our pace as the rain drenched our clothing even further.

 

I quickly ran up the familiar driveway, and fumbled with the key, my fingers shaking. I kicked my shoes off as soon as I barged through the door, and ran to the living room, shedding my wet hoodie, and was shivering because my t-shirt was soaked through as well. This sucked.

 

I sneezed, and I was quivering. “Up…p..st…stairs n…now!” I chattered, and I saw Dave nod.

 

I half ran upstairs to my room, and threw my T-shirt on the floor. I pulled off my jeans, and searched around my room for clothes in nothing but my ghost patterned boxers, when I heard Dave clear his throat.

 

Oh. I forgot about him.

 

Dave was standing still, and I felt like I was being studied, but I’m sure he wouldn’t do that.. I still feel rather self conscious.  

 

“Come on Dave, you must be freezing too! Change into something!” I called out, and I found a pair of jeans and a nice shirt. I hastily put it on, and dashed out of the room, leaving Dave alone.

 

~~

 

Oh.

 

I walked into Egbert’s room, where I saw the boy practically naked… Well, almost. His boxers were all that protected his skin from my curious eyes.

 

His pale skin was smooth, his collar bones protruding. His shoulders were rounded, making him look feminine. I had the sudden urge to run my hands down his porcelain back, but I mentally slapped myself for the thought.

 

I saw him shuffle out after hastily pulling on his clothes, leaving me to change. I thought I saw red blossoming on his cheeks, but I seriously doubt it.

 

I tugged off my shirt, which was pretty damp, making me click my tongue in distaste. I fished in my bag for a fresh set of clothes, finding a folded t shirt and a pair of skinny jeans(which I know for a fact make my ass look good).

 

Walking out of John’s room, I found him in the kitchen, where he had made some grilled cheese sandwiches.

 

“Here.” John handed me a plate. Thanking him, I stood around the counter eating the snack. The cheese was all gooey and stretched as I took a bite, and I thought of how Egbert would make the perfect domestic husband... Wait, _what_?

 

The thought of John in a apron saying, “Welcome home, honey!” entered my mind, and giggles bursted from my mouth. I bit down hard on my tongue to stop myself from spitting out half the sandwich.

 

Egbert was looking at me strangely, trying to understand what was funny.

 

“Dave?”

 

“What?”

 

“What’s so funny?”

 

“Nothing, bro.”

 

“You were laughing.” He narrowed his eyes. Oh my god, this gave me a strange domestic feeling.

 

“Laughing? Was I?” I teased. No way was I letting Egbert know what I was thinking. He didn’t need to know that I pictured him like a stereotypical housewi-I mean _husband_.

 

"The awkward moment when."

 

"Wait John what-"

 

"The awkward moment when your friend starts laughing for no apparent reason, especially after taking a bite out of a grilled cheese sandwich." John said.

 

"Shut up." I glared, but tried to hide my smile."But you know what else is even more awkward?" I started.

 

"What?" he seemed genuinely interested.

 

"I used to think back when I was a little kid that Hannah Montana and Miley Stewart were two different people."

 

"You’ve got to be fucking kidding, it was _obvious_ , dimwit."

 

"Shut the fuck up, even Bro believed for a second that they were."

 

John snorted, "Are all Striders that stupid?"

 

"But wait, there’s more! I went to a Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus concert once… It was fucking awesome dude. Irony at its best." I added, remembering my rather bizarre childhood.

 

"I can't believe you actually went to her fucking concert. She sucks!"  John nearly choked on his grilled cheese sandwich from laughter.

 

I leaned back against the counter, watching the the goofy Egbert wheezing as the gooey cheese almost caused his death.

 

“Shut up dude she was great until the whole disaster with Liam.”

 

“Who the fuck is Liam?” John raised his eyebrows.

 

“Liam Hemsworth, Chris Hemsworth's brother, is Miley’s fiancee. Supposedly they broke up, but no one knows. Also, fyi, Chris Hemsworth is Thor you uncultured swine.” I educated John, his mouth dropped open, probably fascinated by the fact that I knew my celebrity facts.

 

“Why do you know that shit anyway? Plus, Dave, I know who Chris Hemsworth is! Second, the fuck dude? When did you become so involved with celebrity gossip?”

 

I shrugged as I answered, “Irony. It does wonders.”

 

“Shut the fuck up _David_.” he rolled his eyes. Aw hell no.

 

“Oh? _Really_? What about you shut up _Jonathan_?”  I think his full name was Jonathan. Was it?

 

“David Elizabeth what about you shut your trap!” John played along.

 

“Oh? You know what Jonathan Allen Egbert? I will call you Joe for now on. Not John, Not Jonathan. Joe. Like Joe Jonas. You have been demoted.” Was his middle name even Allen?

 

“David.”

 

“Joe.”

 

“David!”

 

“Joe. _Jonas._ ”

 

“Augh fine Dave stop!” John shook his head in laughter, clutching the counter like a lifeline.

 

I tried to hold in my laughter too, and took a careful bite of my grilled cheese.

 

“Now Joe, lets watch a movie shall we?”

 

~~

 

I was snuggled deep into my blanket burrito next to Dave, who brought his very own snuggie. (“You have a snuggie?” “Fuck you Egbert its very reliable”)

 

“So what movie are we watching.” Dave mumbles, lazily resting his head on the armrest of the couch. His legs were spread out on the couch so that left me and my blanket burrito on a small corner of my couch.

 

“Oh its a kiddie movie.” I brought my knees up to my chest. I was waiting as the screen turned blue, as the dvd started playing.

 

“Oh so its Disney.” Dave mused, as the castle popped up.

 

The first scene played, and I thought I heard him whisper, “Oh god.”

 

As the song “One Jump Ahead” was playing, I swore Dave was singing along. But it was so quiet I couldn’t tell if he was singing or mumbling. I noticed it was a habit of his to go off mumbling about who knows what.

 

My eyelids were getting heavy as the movie played, and I was nearly asleep as I woke up by a voice shouting “ _Oh shit_!”

 

I felt some shuffling as I felt the dip on the couch rise up. What was going on?

 

Dave jumped off the couch and faced me, as the familiar notes starting playing.

 

“I can show you the world,” Dave walked closer to my side of the sofa, singing. “Shining, shimmering, splendid.”

 

“Dave no!” I giggled, watching the blond as he strut around the living room.

 

“Tell me princess,” he ran back to me, giving me his hand as he did the whole prince-y bow as he sang, “now when did you last let your heart decide?” he grabbed my hand and dragged me off the couch, as I desperately tried to stay in my blanket cocoon.

 

Dave spun around me, cupping his hands over my glasses, ignoring my protest as he continued, “I can open your eyes, take you wonder by wonder-” he removed his hands, enabling me to see again. “Over sideways, and under on a magic carpet ride.”

 

“Dave you’re so stupid.” I raised my eyebrows.

 

“A whole new world,” he sang, parading around the room in some weird dance. He looked like an emotional bird.

 

“A new fantastic point of view! No one to tell us no, or where to go!” he ‘swooped back to where I was awkwardly standing, pressing a finger on my lip. “Or say we're only dreaming.”

 

He nudged me, and I croaked out, “A whole new world,”

 

“Come on Egbert!” he shouted.

 

I clenched my eyes shut as I sang, “A dazzling place I never knew, but when I’m way up here,” I slowly opened my eyes as I continued, “it’s crystal clear.”

 

I got the Strider nod of approval hell yeah. “That now I’m in a whole New World with you-”

 

“Now I'm in a whole new world with you.” Dave cut in, oh a challenge Strider? Challenge accepted.

 

I let go of my blanket’s embrace, letting my eyes go wide, “ Unbelievable sights, indescribable feelings; Soaring, tumbling, freewheeling through an endless diamond sky.” I ran around the living room looking stupid. Strider was in his own world, doing some crazy parkour move as he jumped on and off the couch and it looked ridiculous. We both did. And I fucking loved it.

 

“A whole new world.” I started.

 

“Don't you dare close your eyes.” Dave made an awesome Aladdin.

 

“A hundred thousand things to see.”

 

“Don't Hold your breath, it gets better.”

 

Running up to each other, we sang facing each other, “I'm like a shooting star, I've come so far… I can't go back to where I used to be,”

 

“A whole new world,” I began, with Dave afterwards singing, “Every turn a surprise,”

 

“With new horizons to pursue,” I continued.

 

“Every moment gets better.” Dave made a goofy face god I can’t take him seriously.

 

“I’ll chase them everywhere, theres time to spare! Let me share this whole new world with you!”

 

We clenched each others hands in the most ironic bromantic hand holding way possible, ending the song with, “A whole new world.” my eyes searched for Dave’s as I felt his gaze on mine.

 

“That’s where will be.” Dave stole my line I think. God I don’t know. But I thought he was leaning his face closer.

 

“A thrilling chase.”

 

“A wondrous place.” yup his face is getting closer. His lips seemed all soft and-

 

“For you and me.” _ABORT ABORT ABORT HOUSTON WE HAVE A PROBLEM!_

 

I pulled my hands away from Dave’s grasp, ignoring how they felt all empty and stuff. I ollied the fuck away, claiming I had to pee, leaving the Apollo reincarnation standing there puzzled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Homestuck, and earlier while I was browsing through the JohnDave tag on tumblr this fanfic was on the recommendation list on this one post so I was all fangirling and such.
> 
> and...
> 
> Homestuck is ending man I really want my otp to be cannon JohnDave must happen.  
> I changed my tumblr it is ectominycocoa.tumblr.com
> 
> hope you guys liked the emotional singing man bird!!!


	9. Sink to the Bottom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John and Dave both have to accept that they like the other, but due to their stupid nature of "he doesn't like me bad nuuu" they both have to sit in their own puddle of misery.
> 
> Rose decides to help John out on picking apart Dave's actions, and to help push those two together.
> 
> (I might rewrite this maybe)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My halloween was pretty interesting. I hope everyone had a great holiday!
> 
> I'm sorry for not posting this earlier, but I haven't been having the best week…
> 
> please enjoy!
> 
> HEY GUYS. 
> 
> I am now tracking the tag "hftft:B" and also "hello for the first time JD" my tumblr once again is ectomintycocoa, so if you want to come and talk about JohnDave I am all ears! (JD as in johndave haha)

Once in the safety of the downstairs bathroom, I pulled out my phone.

 

ectoBiologist[EB] began pestering tentacleTherapist[TT]

 

EB: rose oh my god oh my god i fucked up i fucked up what do i do?

TT: Why hello John what seems to be the matter?

EB: everything rose. everything! i have no idea what to do and i just… fuckkkkkk

TT: Calm down John. Deep breaths.

EB: i knoww

TT: Now. Tell me what happened.

EB: i uh. we uh. i think dave wanted to kiss me.

EB: but i don’t know. i don’t think so?

TT: I see…

EB: and in a way i kind of wanted him too? but at the same time hes my best friend and he probably doesn't think the same way?

EB: cause he was kind of leaning in and stuff and then BAM i ollied the fuck out of there!

EB: what if he tried to fuck with me or wasn't even planning on kissing me you know?

EB: i have no clue if i even wanted dave to kiss me either!

TT: John.

TT: John calm down.

TT: Do you want him to kiss you? Why do you think he wanted to kiss you John?

EB: rose stop saying my name in every fucking sentence it makes me feel stupid.

TT: My apologies, but I would like an answer to my question.

EB: it’s fine :B

EB: but honestly…

EB: i can’t tell.

EB: because sometimes he acts like this closed up heart of ice douchebag.

EB: or sometimes acts like a big friendly teddy bear?

EB: and he does stuff out of the sake of irony and it confuses me.

EB: so i’m like WHAT ARE YOUR TRUE INTENTIONS YOU REINCARNATION OF APOLLO?

TT: Did you just…

TT: Liken him to a greek god?

EB: maybe…

TT: You know Apollo was supposed to be extremely attractive.

EB: oh god

TT: So in a way, you indirectly described Dave Strider as attractive. “Hot” even.

EB: please forget i even said that rose! please!

TT: I won’t tell a soul. But I will use this “fact” to help with my investigation.

EB: what

TT: Well it seems like you have a hard time understanding your own feelings and such and I want to help you.

EB: jesus rose why

TT: Maybe I can help sort your thoughts. I won’t try to force anything, just help lead you through the cluttered mess that is your current… mind. Perhaps then you can come to a conclusion of what you feel about your best friend and also see through his actions towards you.

EB: you think it will help rose

TT: I will do my best. And you must as well. You only have a week with him anyway.

EB: yeah… so what should i do?

TT: First of all tell me the things Dave did that seemed unusual? Or ‘unDavelike’?

TT: Act normal around him too don’t do anything strange. He might suspect something.

EB: is this like a secret operation

TT: Why not.

EB: oh wait… i think i spent too long in here i think hes probably wondering if i’m okay.

TT: Talk to you later then?

EB: yeah sure!

EB: thanks rose for everything

TT: My pleasure.

TT: And John?

EB: yeah

TT: Before you go, I just wanted to tell you that Jade sent the photos.

EB: what!

TT: I thought it was adorable to be honest. And you really forgotten the fact that he kissed your hair in one of the photos? Think about it John.

EB: it was for the sake of irony!

TT: Irony my ass.

EB: well rose i gotta go bye!

ectoBiologist[EB] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist[TT]

 

I quickly ran out of the bathroom, back to where Dave was sitting on the couch, looking as though nothing happened. Maybe nothing did.

 

“Hey Dave.” I sat down next to him on the couch.

 

“Sup.”

 

“So I uh…”

 

“John.” he sounded tired. “So you ran away from my ironic brobrace?”

 

“It was for irony again?” I wondered. Damn it why did I sound so sad? Fuck it all!

 

“Ha ha yeah.” Dave smirked. We went back to watching the movie in silence.

  
  


~~

Dave Strider you fucked up again.

 

It was all going great. I was doing some strange dancing jumping shit, and John’s voice was luring me towards him like… what was it? A seiren? I wouldn’t have minded being devoured by such a attractive guy… I think. Wait was John even attractive? Was he? I mean his hair was a horrendous mess, which looked like a hurricane whirled through and demolished any attempts of neatness, his fashion sense was that of a five year old with khaki colored shorts and baggy shirts, he was a freaking pasty guy with a body structure that resembled one that suited a freshman instead of a senior.

 

But I think it was the eyes.

 

The way they glowed at the dumbest things, the way they watched me with such intensity and wonder that no one ever had. His eyes told the truth. When he was happy, they glowed, dulled when troubled. He was an open book no wonder Lalonde has such an easy time clawing into him and knowing his Egbertian secrets.

 

Now I was just speaking nonsense.

 

Through out the song we were just parading around the room, occasionally glancing at the tv screen and each other, and finally we walked up to each other and grasped our hands. As the song ended I felt the irises study mine, and suddenly I felt the urge to just kiss him. He was so, so close. His lips were close. His eyes sparkled. I wondered if I did, if it would be his first kiss. Then it would be awesome. I imagined his lips would shape perfectly against mine. And we would just stand there and ignore the world as we did so. It would have been the best thing ever.

 

I found myself leaning in, edging towards the soft lips of John Egbert I tried to ignore the fact that John wouldn’t want this, he wasn't into guys probably, especially his best bro. I ignored the fact that this might ruin our friendship. But come on he looks so kissable and adorable and I’m throwing up in my head cause this is so unironic and stupid and god I’m just now rambling oh shut up and kiss him already Jesus fucking-

 

He pulled away, claiming he had to pee, and bolted out of the room. He left me hanging that son of a bitch.

 

I stood there awkwardly for a while, as I felt so empty… My hands wished that his were back tangled with them.

 

I want to die man.

 

I want the world to swallow me up.

 

Cause I realised.

 

I am head over heels over my best friend.

 

In the most unironic way as possible.

 

Fuck. It. All.

 

Later he came back, like nothing happened. I guess I should act like it too even though it kinda hurt.

 

I blamed it all on irony as I watched his face sink. His eyes darkened.

 

We watched the movie in silence. I truly hated myself for blaming it all on irony.

 

~~

 

Dinner was quiet, Dave blamed his jet lag when dad asked him if he felt alright. “Mr. Egbert, I’m going to bed early it was a long day. Thanks for dinner.” he excused himself, nodding his head towards me and went upstairs.

 

I sighed as I watched him go, and just as I was about to  excuse myself too, dad grabbed my hand.

 

“John. Wait.” his eyes were filled with concern. He wasn't going to let me go either.

 

“Dad I...”

 

“You guys had a fight?” he questioned.

 

“Yeah.. kind of. Its a long story.”

 

“I see.” Dad watched me as I picked on the napkin on my lap, fidgeting.

 

“You should talk to him John I’m sure he will understand.” giving me an reassuring smile, he stood up and walked away.

 

Washing the dishes helps me calm my thoughts.  I watched how my hands robotically swirled and scrubbed at the plates, placing utensils into respected slots in the dishwasher, hearing the little chinks as the porcelain tapped against one another as I pushed the rack into the dishwasher, closing the door.

 

I sat down on the kitchen floor as I heard the buzz of the machine starting, I felt my mind at peace, every thought I had of Dave was sorted. For now however, I decided to play it off like nothing happened, and to study him to see if he was… you know. Really was planning on  kiss me earlier.

 

Walking upstairs, I felt my heart pounding loudly, all I could hear was my blood rushing. Why was I so nervous? He was my best friend. Well, a best friend who might of have tried to kiss me but who cares! I am John Egbert! I don’t scare so easily! And I will act like nothing happened damn it.

 

I opened the door to my room, to find that Dave had already dressed in his pj’s, typing furiously on his iPhone. He looked up casually, waving two fingers at me in a cool gesture.

 

“Sup Egbert. Your dad’s cooking is amazing. Damn I never want to leave.”

 

I give out a deep sigh, walking to my dresser. I yanked out a pair of fresh pj’s and walked out to the bathroom, saying, “You should tell him that. He would love to hear it.”

 

Once in the bathroom I felt my heart sink. Oh god. So nothing did happen.

 

I was sad. I was so, so sad. I couldn’t even think of a better word to use. Disappointment? Emptiness? The way he simply waved? What more did I expect of him? _Selfish_. That’s what I am. _I’m so selfish_ , wanting Dave all to myself, wanting him to like me back. I finally recognized the fact that I really liked him, I wanted him so badly… But I should be thankful that he is visiting, there isn’t anything more I should ask of him.… Right?

 

My heart ached as the one thing I truly wished for at that moment was to carve that organ out and let it sit out side to rot.

~~

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKAY GUYS SO I HAVE A PROBLEM. I HAVE TWO IDEAS FOR AN ENDING. ONE OF THEM INVOLVES REINCARNATION, AND THE OTHER ONE IS WHAT I PLANNED FROM THE BEGINNING, A NICE, "NORMAL" ENDING, AND NOT WHAT EVER THING I THOUGHT UP.
> 
> BECAUSE OF MY CURRENT STANDING ON WHAT TO CHOOSE FOR AN ENDING, IT MIGHT TAKE A WHILE TO FINISH THIS. DON'T WORRY. WHICH EVER ONE I CHOOSE WILL HAVE A HAPPY ENDING I PROMISE.
> 
> IF YOU HAVE ANY THOUGHTS ON EITHER OF THESE TWO VAGUE IDEAS OF AN ENDING PLEASE TELL ME.
> 
> I don't own Homestuck.


	10. Float On. ( Why did they name a town after a Utensil: Part One)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dave decides to talk to Rose about John.
> 
> Dadbert gives the two the keys to his car, saying that they can go anywhere they want to the day.. And Dave has an idea of were he wants to go...
> 
> Maybe this trip can get them to take their mind of off things?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay I'm back after... All these months.. Who knew that trying to get into college is such a difficult experience?
> 
> Anyway, please do not kill me for where I planned these two dorks to visit.  
> Also I still do not have a beta reader! So there may be some grammar mistakes, and please do forgive me if you see any small mistakes. I have plowed through all what I wrote to check and rewrite again, but shits hard yo.  
> (this will be split into two chapters)

 

I made it to John’s room, where I yanked off my clothing, changing into my pony pants and “princesses’ rule” t shirt. I didn’t stop to admire the irony of this shirt. You know what? Fuck irony.

 

I sat there on the made up bed on the floor, almost failing to notice the buzzing of my phone. I was starting to hate that device. It was more like a stupid babysitter more than anything. It was a thing that can yank you back to where you started... It can be considered like a  tracking device, I had a feeling that Bro put a chip in it somewhere.

 

I lazily picked up the noisy thing, intending to ignore whom ever was trying to reach me by turning it off.

 

But it seemed to be a text message from Rose, and I rubbed my temples with delicate fingers before proceeding to read the message she sent.

 

**_Hello Dave,_ **

****

**_I was wondering how your stay at the Egbert residence is going. I saw the pictures that Jade had sent me earlier, and you two seem to be having one hell of a time. But, I have noticed in one picture that you did infact kiss him. Of course, knowing you, it may be considered ironic, but also since I seem to understand you more than you do yourself, I have come to the conclusion that that kiss is not at all “ironic.” Before you start stating how this is going to become fuel for my wizard porn fanfiction, and how I am simply over imagining things, I would just like to say that you kissed him because you genuinely wanted to, and if you wanted to have him, you must ditch the entire irony act all together and be more genuine. You are driving us all nuts._ **

****

**_Love,_ **

**_your therabitch- Rose._ **

 

I groaned as I realised that she has figured me all out. Shit.

 

_okay first of all._

_i kissed him on the head_

_and i wanted to give harley some fuckin fanservice like_

_shit girls gotta get her homos in action amiright?_

_well you guessed right rose_

_i did kiss his head but_

_i kind of had to because we did other poses and fuck_

_okay you got me_

_i did kiss him because i really wanted to_

_i mean_

_if you see him face to face its hard to resist the egbertian urge_

_his dad rose he is the most charming shit_

_you see so much of his dad in him like_

_whoa mini me how weird right_

_ha ha_

_but yeah looking at dadbert i see that john is going to still look all young and stuff when older too_

_i bet he will look sexy even_

_fuck_

_why the fuck am i telling you all this?_

 

She was quick to respond, and I swore I could see the smirk she was sporting as she replied,

 

**_I see. But make sure you aren’t sending him any mixed signals Dave._ **

 

I snorted, and sent her a quick reply.

 

_u think im the one with the mixed signals?_

_he is_

_one minute hes all_

_no homo_

_and then hes all like_

_friendly and stuff_

_no homo my ass seriously_

 

Rose snapped back with another text,

 

**_Maybe you both are giving mixed signals. Have you considered that? That you two are both confusing… To each other?_ **

 

Oh.. She has a point.

 

_oh… yeah_

_i guess i kinda am_

_we both are_

_damn rose you got to that quickly_

 

Damn girl... Rose Lalonde is not human. I, Dave Strider, declare that Rose Lalonde is not human. Oh speaking of non humans-

**_Damn right. Now, Dave. Tell me, I heard from a little birdy that you have a and I quote, “a protective streak” especially around our friend. Care to explain?_ **

 

Actually it was a thing I was wondering too. The earlier events of our day played in my mind as I tapped on the phone.

 

_honestly rose_

_idk_

_like i honestly don’t know_

_it just happened like_

_some monstrous douche bag like came up to him and tripped him_

_and called him a dirty homo_

_and i thought “fuck you Bro is into dudes and hes better than you”_

_and i just got like_

_defensive? and territorial like_

_don’t touch him mofos hes mine_

_my bro damn it_

_and_

_i beat him up_

_and then i beat him up again because i saw he was going to punch john_

_i never did that before rose_

_its weird_

_really_

_i broke so many strider laws for this one guy and its random as fuck_

 

I sent so many one lined messages it must drive Lalonde insane, but it was nice of her to not interrupt my ramblings.

 

It did cause my stomach to churn a bit when she sent the last reply however.

 

**_Dave. I understand that John is an important person to you, but you cannot beat the shit out of someone for being a dick. Be the better person Dave, and if something like that happens again just walk away with John. And from reading your messages I can tell that you’re head-over-heels over our friend. And you’re just going to be in this everlasting circle of “But he doesn’t like me back” bullshit, and it’s never going to go anywhere._ **

****

**_I’m going to sleep now Dave, it’s pretty late over here. Good night._ **

 

I looked up as John walked into the room, hoping that he doesn’t see how tired I looked. He was quiet, walking over to get his clothes to bring with him in the bathroom, leaving me in an awkward silence.

 

Instead of apologizing for earlier or telling him good night, I praised him about his dad’s skill in cooking. God damn it.

 

I decided to avoid any more awkward confrontations with John by sleeping early.

 

~~

 

_I opened my eyes to a beautiful view of the sky, the wind teasing my hair and flowing past my clothes. Clouds were dotted along the vast plane of blue, and I realized that… I was flying. Well, more like floating high above the ground._

_I turn around to see a figure dressed entirely in shades of blue, his ravenette hair tousled in the breeze, his cerulean eyes matching the sky itself. He smiled at me, a brilliant smile, and he reminded me of someone. Someone I once forgot. But why?_

_He was mouthing something at me, smiling sadly. I wanted to go over to him, but I couldn’t. My feet stayed firmly where it was ‘planted’ and I could only watch as the familiar boy mouthed something that looked like he was saying,_

_“I’m sorry.”_

 

I bolted up, taking deep breaths as I turned to see if John woke up from his sleep. He was still snoring lightly, his face in a peaceful expression. I pulled myself off the makeshift bed, slumping towards the window, looking out at the peach colored sky. It wasn't my favorite shade of blue at the moment. It was strange how the sky was always a source of comfort to me, looking up the the endless blue gave a warm flutter to my heart. For some reason I felt like I loved the sky, I loved what it represented to me. Something important was tied into the horizon, and I never questioned the sense of longing and nostalgia that washed over me since I was a little kid..

 

I felt a tap on my shoulder and I pulled my eyes away from the window, to a sleepy John, who was blinking slowly and groaned, “Dave what are you doing?”

 

I shook my head saying, “Just appreciating nature John. That’s all.”

 

From a happy cry of relief I learned that today was Saturday. Of course it was. After treading down stairs his dad called out to us saying that we could use his car today, he was going over to a neighbor's. After throwing the keys to John he walked out the door, leaving us standing in the living room, wondering where we should go.

 

(Ten minutes later...)

 

“No.”

 

“But John.”

 

“No. I don’t want to! Go by yourself!” he shouted, his face reddening.

 

“But John! I’m in Washington. You know how fucking ironic this would be?!”

 

“It’s almost three hours away.... BY CAR! What about gas?” he tried to think up excuses... Well then.

 

“Dude... Your dad. Has a hybrid. Yeah it may not be a prius, but come on John we’re doing it we are visiting Forks Washington whether you like it or not.” I countered his ridiculous argument, and I can always pay for more gas anyway.

 

I pulled him over to his computer, forcing him to look at the damn screen.

  
  
  
  


“Look John! See? It isn’t that far.. You got your license right?” I pressed. If not I could drive...

 

“Yeah I do Dave..” he sighs.

 

“We can take turns driving John. Come on please? It would be so fucking ironic! It’s not everyday we can go see where Twilight was based in! We can reenact the scenes and-”

 

“Dave.” John looked at me dead in the eyes. “Do you.. actually like Twilight?”

 

“No!” I immediately shot down whatever strange assumption Egbert was having.

 

“You sure?” John wiggled his eyebrows. What was I supposed to say, that me and Bro wanted to see what the big hype was and read it together? And since I read the books I wanted to watch the movie to see how it was portrayed?  How was I going to explain to John that I was pissed off about the whole Carlisle dying thing during the-

 

“I just watched it cause I was bored alright? Jeez Egbert don’t smother me.” I simply shrugged, successfully hiding my past history with the book series. “But I thought it would be funny you know, to like horribly act out some parts and send them to the girls? Seriously man imagine how high your prankster’s gambit would fucking rise when Harley gets a load of this.”

 

John sighed, his eyes rolling dramatically as he admitted defeat. “Fine...”

 

“Sweet.” I laughed. Oh this was going to be a blast.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yup..... They're going to Forks... Honestly I just felt like writing it since I am a one, bored child.
> 
> Also, I have thought up a nice ending to this fix, I'm so glad I finally have a decent plot out line! 
> 
> I will add a tag here, because I'm sorta lazy atm to write one on the actual tags themselves, and it might be a spoiler.... the tag is.
> 
> Reincarnation.
> 
> Yup.
> 
> And sorry if my Dave seems a bit ooc.... Whoops.
> 
> Sometimes writing here is like having a one woman show laughing at my own jokes.. Hahah
> 
> My tumblr is ectomintycocoa, if you have any questions or updates.  
> I also check the tag "hello for the first time", "hftft".  
> Or just a tag with my user??? But I was thinking about something like this, "davejohn power" for all the pepsicola fics I write? I don't know guys I'm just sitting here seductively with a laptop on my lap munching on a oversized bag of restaurant style tortilla chips.


	11. Jenny ( Why did they name a town after a Utensil: Part Two)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Studio Killer's makes a lot more sense than both boys thought. 
> 
> Does Forks offer more than Vampire merch? Do they even have Vampire merch? Read to find out folks!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *wanders in* is this..... update wonderland???? Oh
> 
> ANYWAY sorry for the long break. Finishing up school was harder than I thought, and I couldn't find time to write which really isn't no excuse and I apologize for that.
> 
> I hope to write as much as I can during the summer before I start Uni, but please understand that I am actually busy this summer (ART CLASSES and math class... EW)
> 
> I'm going to SDCC guys! On Saturday, but most likely you might find me walking around the general area during the week or so. If you guys wants to say hi and make friends and cry over JohnDave and Logan Lerman together let's meet up! The more the merrier.

After a quick debate it was decided that Dave and I would take turns driving, Dave saying he should start first because I still looked tired. I shrugged, as Dave quickly was setting the directions by shouting the address to siri. After sometime of watching him curse at siri, I snatched the phone away from him, manually typing the damn address into the phone. I ignored how Dave gave the smallest pouts. God what a baby.

As we slid into the car, as I made a move to plug my iPod into the AUX cord, but Dave slapped my hand away, pulling out a iPod from his jacket pocket.

“Hey!” I shouted, glaring at him as he plugged in his damn device instead.

“Look. John. I’m driving, so we play my tunes. Got it?”

“No I don’t get it, I don’t want to listen to just fucking techno this entire fucking ride.”

Dave huffed, “No dude I just don’t listen to that you know. I listen to other stuff too.”

“Oh really?” I raised an eyebrow.

“Yup.” he simply replied, and started pulling out of the driveway.

Some cheery music started playing.

“Dave what the-”

_Jenny darling, you’re my best friend._

__

_But there’s a few things that you don’t know of._

__

_Why I borrow your lipstick so often._

__

_I’m using your shirt as a pillow case-_

“I wanna ruin our friendship.” Dave sang along, “ we should be lovers insteaaaaad.”

“I don’t know how to say this, because you’re really my dearest friend.”

Dave is a dork. Honestly.

I placed my pillow that I brought with me against the car window, resting my head against it. I closed my eyes to try to get some more shut eye, while trying to ignore Dave singing about some girl talking about how she wanted to be romantically involved with her best friend...

Oh fuck you Dave. Fuck. You.

The feelings from last night washed over me again, causing me to groan quietly as I wondered if I would be okay if I rolled out of the car and onto the street. Hopefully Dave wouldn’t notice my disappearance.  I can roll my way to freedom and find a clan of hippies living in the forests in their hippie camps and live my days in nirvana. Peace man. Then  there would be no more Dave, no more Betty Crocker, and no more crappy kid’s at school. How nice.

While I was silently drowning in my own puddle of self pity, I fell asleep.

~~

I didn’t expect the first song to play from my iPod to be Jenny. I silently cursed Studio Killers as I played along to this rather ‘convenient’ situation, singingly loudly and proudly along with Chubby Cherry, both of us crying on about best bros.

I looked over to my “Jenny” and he looked to be asleep, his eyebrows knitted together as though he was concentrating. His lips were mouthing words that I couldn’t hear. He still looked peaceful though, his eyelids I noticed where a dark shade of purple, and above his eyebrow was a little scar, too small to notice without studying his face carefully. I realized what a fucking creep I was, staring at my best bro. Ugh.

I went back to staring at the road, with fucking siri being a useless piece of shit making me use Google Maps instead. I love you Google. Marry me.

~~

_“Hey. Do you want to know something funny Egbert?”_

__

_I turn to face a figure in a black suit, my lips curving into a large smile. This person was so comforting. Trustworthy. I felt like I can place my entire future, my life right into his hands and I can be happy about it._

__

_“I didn’t expect you to be so.... short. Ha ha. Your hair is a mess man.” I saw a hint of a smile on his sunglass clad face._

__

_“Oh shut up!” my dream self laughed, “what the hell is this place anyway? You didn’t make it sound like it would be so.... Hot.” I added while fanning myself. The scenery was a burning red, probably because of the lava...  and the sound of grinding gears filled my ears but my dream self didn’t seem to give a shit._

__

_“You ready to go on to the next gate John?” he pulled a sword out of no where._

__

_“Yeah! Let’s do this.” suddenly in my hands was a strange looking hammer. For some reason I knew it was called wrinkle fucker._

__

_“Sweet.” the dude replied. He looks so familiar. Huh._

~~

Egbert woke up with a confused look in his eyes, and I felt him staring at me from the corner of my vision. “Dave..?” he asked in a groggy voice. Aw how cute.

“Yeah bro? Had a nice nap?” I casually asked.

“Uh... yeah.” he replied dreamily. “I had this nice dream.. I can’t really remember it well, but it was nice.”

“Cool.”

John kept on staring out the window, looking all serene. I’m not sure that’s how I should describe it, but he looked calm. Much more calmer than the timid way he was last night and stuff. Yeah I noticed he wasn't himself for a bit. But I guess that something must have happened in his sleep or he wouldn’t be this calm.. Right?

~~

Staring out the window was nice. The scenery was all lush with plants and tall trees, and I felt time slip by as I studied the world outside the window. The dream which I could hardly remember now comforted me, and I felt that I could face Dave again. It just felt right to do so.

“Dave?” I started, turning to him slowly.

“Yeah?” he spared me a glance and went back to the road.

I took in a deep breath. “I’m sorry.”

“What?”

“I said I’m sorry. Really. For everything.”

“Why.” I could see him tense a bit.

“I’m sorry for acting like a dick towards you. You don’t deserve it. Sorry for being a shitty host and all, and I hope we can just put this behind us dude.” I rushed out the words quickly. There.

“Oh.” he paused, his shoulders relaxing once more. “It’s fine. Sorry for being a douchebag to you too. Yeah let’s put this shit behind us ok? Let’s go to Forks and unironically enjoy ourselves yeah?”

I felt my lips curving themselves into a grin, and turned back to face the road. Everything will always be right with Dave.

_Always._

~~

After three hours of driving with one stop at a seedy gas station, we finally made it onto Forks Washington.

Halfway through John insisted to switch with me, and so did the music. It wasn't that bad though. I only felt like chewing my leg off once. It was a big improvement than the times he sent me those shitty iTunes playlists. Shh don’t tell him that I said that.

The town is what you would call “sleepy” and overall pretty normal. I thought there would be vampire merch everywhere. But I guess not. There seemed to be places where you could go fishing, and also trials to go hiking. The high school seemed to be around the same size as Egbert’s, although this school was in the same town unlike John’s.

“Yo Egbert we should get lunch.” I nodded towards the direction of a small diner. He murmured in agreement and pulled in to the diner’s parking lot a bit too eagerly, betraying how hungry he was.

Stumbling into the diner the hostess smiled at us and asked if we were a party of two in which John nodded frantically. Smiling, she slowly led us to a table and sat us down. She handed out two worn menus, and asked if we wanted anything to drink.

“Pepsi.” John replied without missing a beat.

They had no aj. Tsk.

“I’ll have a coke.” I drawled out. No use in trying to speak normal.

The young hostess walked away with a bounce in her step. Wait a minute.

“Dude.” John whispered to me, using the menu to shield his face as he whispered across the table, “are you trying to pick up girls... _Now??_ ”

I pshhhed. “Naw. I’m just tired.” I did the accent for him too, just to show that I wasn't using my Texan charm for just some random hostess.

The hostess came back with our respective sodas, and told us that the waitress was coming in “Just a sec!”

God she was extremely over enthusiastic. Reminded me of a certain someone.

I looked over to John, who had his tongue poking out and his eyebrows furrowed together, studying the menu with such determination.

At the quick glance at the menu it seemed like a burger was the best way to go. I saw that they offered country fried chicken, but hey living in the south with Cracker Barrel makes you not feel the need to try a West Coast version of this. They might mess it up you know? Shit’s serious. Kind of like Chinese takeout.

The waitress came by, this time a older lady with a charming smile. Oh what was up with me today? Throwing random ass compliments and shit. Stupid Washington. Messing up my groove.

Okay that was silly gotta admit.

“I’ll have the garden burger.” John nodded towards the waitress.

“I’ll get the American Burger.” I passed the menu to the waitress. She gave an “okie dokie boys.” and left with our orders.

“So.” John leaned towards me. “Let’s play twenty questions.”

~~

After a heated exchange of twenty questions which ranged from embarrassing  reveals to an lengthy, passionate rant of why Matthew McConaughey’s acting was so superb and rivals that of George Clooney (which earned a scoff from Dave) we ate our meals in silence, trying to think up better topics to fling at one another in the next round of twenty questions.

“Let’s blow this joint.” Dave got up after splitting the bill. He grabbed his phone to open up a map of this small town, and pointed out a small park. “Here. Let’s go here John. There’s some trials from there too.”

“Aw what?” I complained, as an experienced Washingtonian (if that’s a real word) it was important to make sure that this blasted weather doesn’t turn around and start to rain on you. Cause you can pretty much count on it. But the look on my phones’ weather map told me otherwise, that it’s going to remain a nice, cloudy day. Great.

Dave drove his way to the small park, and once we parked he pulled out a bottle of sunblock, and began smearing the stuff onto his face. He took care to get every inch of this face coated with the cream, and offered the bottle to me. I shook my head, pulling out my baseball cap I had stashed in the car years ago. Dave shrugged as he squirted more sunblock onto his hands, massaging the stuff onto his neck as he explained,  “look. Unlike you, I don’t tan. I turn into a nasty shade of tomato red, and my skin peels and blisters. Then afterwards a fuck ton of freckles come out of nowhere.” He pronounced tomato like ‘toe-may-toe’ ha ha.

Hopping out of the car he walked on ahead of me, checking out some of the signs provided near the trails.

“Hey John this one seems to lead to a field or some shit.” he inspected the sign, “3 miles... So overall this trail is three miles long. What do you think bro?”

I thought about it. “Nah the field sounds cool and all, but we need to get home before it gets too late. What if my dad needs the car?”

“Bro.... You know how long you take when you walk a mile? It’s around forty minutes at most.”

“Dude I fucking know that. But this probably only means that to get the the field it’s three miles. Three to get there and three to go back. Six miles.” I crossed my arms.

I could tell that he rolled his eyes. “Alright then what about that one?” He pointed to another trail, that one a mile and a half. Hm. Sounds manageable.

“Sure. Sounds good.” I gave him my consent. Oh shut up hiking isn’t my thing alright?

Grabbing a backpack we found in the trunk and filling it with water bottles and snacks from the gas station, I followed Dave was we ventured into the forest that the trail led to.

**  
~~**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again if anyone has any questions on this fic or other projects I have coming up..... my tumblr is still ectomintycocoa. (Or just want to talk? yeah!)
> 
> I'll be quick to respond! And if anyone wants to doodle for this fic or anything I would love it really! I don't really have a tag for this fic so for now just "hftft" will do???
> 
> The other day an anon asked about this fic, and I feel bad even now that I made some people wait for so long just to read what happens next :( I'm sorry.


	12. Edward Cullen's Bloody Honey ( Why did they name a town after a Utensil: Part Three)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John and Dave realize that they have something in strange common. Dave remembers his dreams as a little kid. John has a request.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dude college takes up so much of my time it isn't even funny anymore jegus. I know that the UPD8 has happened. I doubt my otp will ever become cannon. Come on John just fucking kiss Dave already JEEZ. Anyway the upd8 kind of is slow at the moment you know?
> 
> Anyway I'm sorry for my long absence, it was 'loserly' for me to do so. The term was coined in Bad Lip Reading. Being a freshman in an Art Major requires so much of your time! And so does anime!  
> Ok this has reached the three fourths way of the fic, I will work on it more so that I can finally REACH THE PRIME. (I've been thinking about that part of the story in a long time sigh.)

Unlike myself, Dave seemed to have an easier time maneuvering around rocky grounds, walking through it easily. My feet slipped every now and then, cursing at the fact that I left my old hiking boots at home, my van’s failing to grip the rocky surface.

While he leaped easily over fallen branches and thick, twisted roots from the near by trees I climbed over the obstacles with less grace. But he always waited for me with a “Come on Egbert? Seriously?” with a short laugh. Not cool Strider. Not cool.

Eventually the trail led to a small lake (more like a pond to be honest) with small comfy benches made of carved wood and small fire pits. Ignoring the benches provided I proceeded to sit at the water’s edge, staring at the murky surface below. To my disgust the water had plastic bags stuck at the muddy bottom, and glittering beer cans half embedded in the sandy mixture. Ew.

“I guess people come here for.... kickbacks or something?” Dave shrugged, sitting on the ground next to me. 

“I dunno.” I shrugged as well. Maybe shrugs are contagious. I felt bad for the fish in the lake. The town of Utensils, Washington needs to get its shit together. I mean, my town occasionally has it’s clean up days... Maybe this part of the area is forgotten?

“Yo.”

“Eh?” I turn to face Dave, who seemed to also study the water. He looked over to me, shaking his head, “and here I thought your town was boring. Did you know that I somehow saw some Twilight merch while we we’re driving by? The movie ended already sheesh.”

“Wait are you disappointed at the fact that you managed to find Twilight merch?” I nearly spit. 

“Well, I mean that movie was shit bro. And to be honest I was kind of curious on what the town was actually like? The one that lady based it on? I don’t even think that she ever visited Forks till after she wrote that fucking book and all... I mean, Anchorman was and is a great movie, but you don’t see the sunny-ass-taco-eating San Deigan’s having Ron Burgundy shit all over the damn place.”

“Then what kind of dumb merch do they have there Dave?” I rose an eyebrow. I never really visited California, and the farthest I gotten there was the Northern side, and was in shock that there was a town called Weed. God damn it California. 

“Just some Shamu stuff.” realizing that I had no idea what this ‘Shamu’ guy was he explained, “SeaWorld’s mascot. He’s a killer whale. Now, believe me I don’t understand why they have a fucking killer whale-ya know, with the word killer- as a cute, fluffy mascot making kids believe that evil sonuvabitch isn’t a world class killing machine. I mean did you see the video? Of Shamu eating a pelican? Shit it was so fucked up you know? It was so gross. I went to SeaWorld back when-”

“Dave!”

“What.”

I chuckled light heartedly, leaning over to pap his shoulder, “You went off mumbling again.”

His cheeks dusted into a light pink, the tips of his ears burning a bright red. “Oh shit. Sorry.”

“No no” I wave my hands in the universal -it’s ok I don’t give a shit hooray- signal. “It’s all right! I didn’t want to get left behind on the Dave train that’s all.”

Shit that sounded so corny and stupid. 

“Naw man it’s ok. I don’t want to leave you behind on the Strider Express.” he gave a small grin, causing me to smile back in return, ten fold. 

~~  
After a while of lounging around we agreed to head on back, before the it got dark. Driving at night wasn't always the best idea.

While on the car drive back home, Dave managed to buy a jar of “Edward Cullen” honey. It was blood red from the added cherry syrup making it look like an “organic glop of fake blood.” As it said on the label.

Dave was the one driving this time, telling me to drive after we reach the halfway point. Even as the sun was slowly making it’s way down, the numbnutz still refused to take off his sunglasses. I’m guessing that when the sun finally sets it will be my turn to drive, since I don’t have ridiculous spectacles that should not be worn at night. 

Strider was awfully quiet, every now and them muttering about something. eventually he turned to me, and asked, “Egbert?”

“Yeah?” I twisted my head to the side to face him.

“Did you ever.... Um.”

“Um?”

“Did you ever think that there was something more to this world?” Dave wondered, his gaze returning to the road.

“What do you mean?” 

“Sometimes I get the feeling that there is something, or someone I know out there. Outer space I mean.”

I nearly snorted. “Like what? Aliens?”

“Yeah. And I cannot remember them clearly. It’s a gut feeling. Like in a past life I knew aliens.”

I furrowed my eyebrows, trying to think up different alien species from the past sci fi movies I watched. But then I remembered that sometimes in my sleep, I dreamed of a girl, never really sure what she looked like, but she had a loud, confident laugh. For some reason, she seemed to have gray skin.

“Dave... did these aliens that you speak of.” I started, “Did they have gray skin?”

I noticed how hard he gripped the steering wheel after I commented, his knuckles straining against the thin layer of skin. Oh shit.

“Yeah. They did.” he managed to say, “Do you think.. we actually met these kind of.. individuals before?” 

I shrugged. “Maybe we got abducted at some point in our lives.”

He gave a weak laugh in reply. “Maybe we did.”

“Sweet. It’s what bros do. We get abducted by aliens.” I tried to lighten the mood.

Dave didn’t reply.

~~

John knew of these aliens too?

I always had dreams of these aliens, since I was a little kid. The guys in my dreams had gray hair, and weird colored horns, kind of like candy corn. 

The weird thing was, it felt like snippets of my memory, because of how real they felt. Not like usual kiddie dreams of trucks and SBAHJ, even the occasional dream of apple juice. But more tangible. They were real. 

Also, I dreamed about Bro a lot too. He cut a meteor in half, (I asked him about it later but he simply laughed and shooed me away) and I saw him dead. I remember waking up in tears and shaking, these nightmares about some dream version of my bro lying dead in front of me. Bro tried to calm me down, and eventually the dreams started to appear less frequently, instead I started to see a younger version of Bro, often wearing a weird pair of puffy, purple pants.

John sat quietly besides me for the rest of the ride till he switched, trying to play some cheery tunes to combat the rather somber atmosphere. God I’m such a dick.

As we neared his town John quietly asked, “Hey Dave, do you want to go to Seattle tomorrow?”

“Seattle?” I replied.

“Yeah Seattle. It’s fun I promise! There is much more to do than Forks... And here. I promise.” I snuck a peek at his face right then, and my heart felt like exploding. Even in the dim lighting in the car, his eyes still shone brightly, causing my chest to feel a pang of nostalgia. 

Weird.

God damn it Egbert stop smiling like that.

“Sure. I’m good with that Egbert.” I easily slid out of the car as it stopped in the driveway. Seattle huh. 

“Is it a date?” I turn to face him, wiggling my eyebrows.

“Wait what?!” John sputtered, his face burning into a ripe shade of red. He is cute when he’s flustered.

“Come on John just say it is. For my poor maiden heart.” I added on smoothly, like icing on a cake. Blue icing to be exact.

“Fine you loser.” he shook his head. “It’s a date.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reading the comments makes me so happy, you guys are wonderful, thank you for sticking to this! Really! As an avid fanfic reader I understand the pain of waiting for an update. Sorry.
> 
> Check out my tumblr! It's ectomintycocoa.tumblr.com
> 
> Also, there is Shamu merch. More like a bunch of Killer whales all over the damn place.  
> Here is a video of Shamu killing a pelican It's nine minutes long. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=52o5yV6G7tY  
> I cried laughing. I'm terrible.  
> If you draw anything for this fic i will love you forever!!! I'm sure you can just tag it as just the fic name. I will find it. I promise. Or just submit it too y e a h.


	13. Sugar, We're Going Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John becomes troubled in his dreams, and Dave gives Rose a update on his current status of his Strider feels.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was watching Madoka Magica a few months ago when I was writing the first part of this chapter.... heh. heh.  
> I'm sorry for not updating for a while! And I would like to thank the people who visited my tumblr to say hello!

 

_“John.”_

_I turn around, my gaze unable to face his. I couldn’t face him.  In my hand held Zillyhoo, gripped tight, tense after the battle with Jack. Dave stood there, silently studying me. Even as god tiers we couldn’t beat Jack. Dave arrived right after Rose and Jade died of Heroic deaths, leaving me behind to face Dave and tell him the outcome._

_“Are you okay?” Dave started, frowning slightly._

_“Rose went on ahead of me. I couldn’t stop her.” I replied, trying to keep my composure._

_“I see.”_

_“Jade tried to fight Jack soon after.” I took a deep breath, “they’re gone and they are not coming back.”_

_“They didn’t wait for me?” Dave shook his head, “god damn it.”_

 

_But for some reason I felt like I had a conversation like this before. Multiple times actually._

 

_“Dave?”_

 

_He freezes, as though he knew what I was going to say. “Yeah?” he answered back, trying to sound nonchalant._

 

_“Did we have this conversation before? I’m probably getting some serious deja vu right now.” I ask bitterly, noticing how his expression turned cold._

 

_“Yeah. It probably is.” oh man. He is shutting me out. Fuck. Please not now._

 

_“I’m sorry!” I found myself blurting out. I don’t want to lose him too._

 

_Dave shook his head. “Don’t be... Don’t ever be sorry ok?” he muttered under his breath. He took a step towards me, until I felt arms embracing me into an awkward hug. This sudden shift in his attitude left me startled._

 

_“John.”_

 

_“Yes?” I reply, muffled by his shoulder._

 

_“I promise that you I’ll get it right. I’ll fix everything ok?” he pulled away, turning his back towards me._

 

_“Hold up! What are you talking about?!” I cry out, grabbing a hold of his arm. Where the fuck did this come from?_

 

_“Remember how we found out this session would fail? How we can’t win this game?” he suddenly sounded so tired. Exhausted._

 

_I nod, my grip on his arm tightening. What was he trying to say? Why would he bring back a fact that I already knew so well?_

 

_“I want to see if I could fix this John. Fix this session so we can all survive this. So we have no regrets. I don’t want to see my friends die.”_

_He turned to face me. “Egbert I don’t want to see you sad anymore.” he sighs, as though he already explained this to me before countless times. A gut feeling tells me that he probably has._

 

_“We just. Have to beat the game somehow. Even without our witch or seer. Maybe when we win it our friends will come back? Maybe our guardians will too?” I try to reason with him._

 

_“Davesprite told me that you were never the same after the Scratch.” he tugged his arm out of my reach. “I should have been there for you. I should have been there for Rose. I needed to be there for Jade! Fuck I needed to help out Bro but I wasn’t able to. I couldn’t. I can’t do anything right John!”_

 

_He fixed his composure, his cape doing a dramatic flap. “Let me do something right. I’ll go back as much as it takes. I need to save you.”_

 

_“You don’t need to! I don’t need no saving. It’s not your burden to carry Dave!” I shout, my fists clenching at the sides. “Let me help you! We can beat this game! I know we can! You can’t just... fix things by yourself.”_

 

_There was a sudden shift in the air, a small change. It was subtle but I felt it, like how one can feel a charge of electricity in the air. Dave was going to do his “timey” thing again, but this time I wasn’t so sure if I was going to see him again._

 

_“I watched you die too many times.” was his last words to me. And he was gone._

 

_~~_

John woke up with tears running down his cheeks. He got up, wiping his eyes with jerky motions.

 

“Dude? Are you ok?” I tense up.

 

“Yeah.” his voice sounded distant. “I had a bad dream that’s all.”

 

I went back to sleep, after reading the clock. Damn it was way too early to be all mother hen over him.

 

A few hours later I woke up again, and saw that John wasn't in his bed. My heart stopped beating for a split second as I jot out of bed, flash stepping towards the bathroom, noting that he wasn’t in there. I don’t know why I had a sudden desperation to make sure he was alright. John could handle himself. Even with that thought it didn’t stop me from barging down the stairs, running into the sight in the kitchen of the Egbert’s hugging each other.

 

“You okay John?” Mr. Egbert asked, none of them noticing my intrusion yet.

 

“Nothing. I’m ok dad. I just wanted a hug.” John replied, eventually pulling back. I don’t know how this weekend turned into some kind of drama fest, but honestly something changed when I met Egbert in person. I don’t know. Just a hunch.

 

“Oh! Dave.” John greeted. “Good morning! Want a cup of apple juice with your toast?” he started moving automatically to the bag of sliced bread, slipping two slices in the toaster.

 

“Sure. Thanks.” I shrug, reaching for the cupboards nearby to pull out two glasses and a mug for his dad’s coffee.

 

“Dave you didn’t have to.” Dadbert scolded gently, taking his mug and filling it with his morning brew.

 

“‘S nothing.” I reply, taking the plate with my now perfectly golden toast from John. I sit down at the table as John waits for his toast to finish, his dad also fishing out a slice from the bag.

 

Breakfast was a quiet one, Mr. Egbert once again handing the keys to John after finding out his intentions to visit Seattle for some sightseeing.

 

“John is keeping you busy huh?” he winked, as I shrugged, “Yeah. I feel like such a tourist because of him.”

 

“Shut up Dave!” Egbert punched me in the shoulder. _Ow_.

 

“John watch your language.” older Egbert shook his head. He later excused himself, rinsing his plate and asking John to clear the table soon after.

 

After he left John turned to me. “So. Is there anything you want to do in the city?”

 

“I dunno.” I shrugged. I was more curious about the dream he had that made him so upset.

 

“John if you don’t mind me asking, uh what your dream was last night? You woke up looking upset. You got me worried bro.” I shrug to look indifferent and casual, but inside I felt anxious.

 

John paused, biting his lower lip in concentration. I noticed how his eyes darkened, making me wonder if I fucked up or not. “Actually. I don’t know. All I remember is that I felt really sad afterwards, like I lost a good friend.”

 

“Shit. That sucks.” I sipped my juice, giving a nice pat on his shoulder, to give him some comfort.

 

“Oh uh.” His cheeks flush, in turn making my heart give out a painful squeeze, “Thanks Dave.”

 

“No problem.”

 

“Anyway.” John wagged his finger, changing the subject. “We get to use the car again. So. What are we going to do in Seattle? And this time we’re going with a game plan!”

 

“The… sky scraper thing? The tall thing that looks like a needle.” I try.

 

“You mean the space needle?”

 

“Yeah. Yeah that one. Let’s go to that one.”

 

John pulls out his phone, saying he was going to look up info on the Needle building to make sure it was open on a Sunday. If not, he said, we could always just walk around. Maybe even stop by the original Starbucks. I replied, whatever floats your boat Frank. John asked if it was a Sponge Bob reference.

 

“Well. I’m going to get ready.” He got up, ready to go back upstairs.

 

“I’m going to get some more juice so I’ll stay down here for a bit.”

 

“Not too long though! We have a long drive!” I heard from a distance.

 

I whip out my phone, opening up the pesterchum application.

 

            turntechGodhead[TG] is now pestering tentacleTherapist[TT]

 

TT: Hello Dave.

TG: morning

,

TG: shit rose uh

TG: can i tell you a thing

TG: but dont do your therapist thing today i just want you to listen ok can you do that can you do me that one simple thing rose

TG: one

TG: simple

TG: thing

TT: Cross my heart, hope to die. Stick a needle in my eye.

TT: Now lay it on me.

TG: okay first dont stab your eyes out gross

TG: second of all i think i might have a date

TG: with john

TG: yes now rose stop crying and saying your ship is cannon because idk yet

TG: you might think oh dave you finally came to your senses! yes homo

TG: but nah i dont really know if its a date or not

TG: you never know with him

TG: but he blushes a lot and gets all red ‘n flustered

TG: its kinda cute

TG: so im thinking that since were gonna go to seattle today

TG: maybe i could ask him out ya know on a real date

TG: tell him how i feel

TT: That sounds very sweet. Try not to overdo it though Dave.                

TG: shit i wanted to give him a ring and steal him away to the country

TT: Not today. Maybe next time.

TT: So you’re actually going to go through with this? What changed your mind?

TG: well this is the weird part tbh

TG: i dont really know what changed my mind about spilling my nasty guts

TG: ive been having dreams lately about this figure in blue

TG: i feel like i met him before he reminds me so much about john

TG: every time i see this dude in my dream my heart goes crazy and its dumb

TT: Is it?

TG: i just have the feeling that i met egbert once before and whatever gushy shit i felt back then i feel it now

TG: i know it doesnt make much sense but i think these dreams i have of a weird place have something to do with him

TT: Interesting. So you believe that these dreams are somehow connected between you and John?

TG: yup

TT: So from what I understand it seems as though you’re trying to pick off where you left off. From your dreams that is.

TG: ding ding you got it

TT: I wish you luck then.

TG: thanks

TG: well i need to go and get ready ill hit you up with the deets later k

TT: Alright. Talk to you later.

TG: bye

 

turntechGodhead[TG] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist[TT]

 

turntechGodhead is now an idle chum!

 

I look away from my phone. Shit. Now I need to find the perfect time, place, and all that jazz to casually bring up these mushy stuff in my chest.

 

Fucking. Shit. On. A. Stick. It’s gonna be rough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried a few times to use the formating for pesterchum and I can't do it. It doesn't work for me. :/
> 
> For any questions and concerns, my tumblr url is ectomintycocoa. I also have an art blog too! Check it out yeah? Look for mintyghost on tumblr.


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